European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - October 21, 1990, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Nothing like a sturdy bag on a Rainy Day Ellen Newmar guest columnist on a recent trip to the land of styrofoam cups i found myself in a supermarket watching in Awe As a Young Man expertly packed my groceries. My emotions surged. To think the bag was free of charge and the Young Man was trained to do this Well and courteously. What a country swept by a wave of patriotism i tipped him a fiver. Out of the Comer of my Eye i caught him making gestures designed to throw doubt on my sanity. He did no to understand. But he Wasny to with me in Germany that cold Rainy morning when i had to go out to phone a plumber. As a new arrival in Germany i was surprised to hear that it would take three to five weeks to get a phone. But the Telephone clerk quickly pointed out with teutonic Pride that in some countries it takes five years. Only five weeks what Luck. I was also shocked at first to learn that according to local custom i had to buy my own Kitchen sink and hire a plumber to install it a until i was told How fortunate we were to have found a place with lights. Its All relative. So on that Bone Chilly wet morning cheered by All this Good Luck i bundled up grabbed my umbrella and went out to find a phone. The plumber Wasny to Home but i was already Damp so i figured id walk a few More blocks to the fabulous Village bakery whose tempting window id begun seeing in my dreams. The bakery was warm and fragrant with White Apro Ned Frai Pleins tossing around Golden loaves of bread and slicing up Rich torts. Realizing i need restraint i pointed primly to the croissants. Then i saw the Cream puffs. Immediately i was seized by the mad sugar lust known for striking americans in German bakeries. My Index Finger had a life of its own Cream puffs Apple strudel fruit tarts Black Forest torte. When i regained control there was a line of paper packages on the counter about a Yard Long. I waited for her to bag it All but she was already waiting on the next customer a a German woman in leather pants and Spike heels who was carrying a cute Wicker Basket into which she neatly packed her purchases. Aha the Basket. Another quaint local custom. I scooped up my goodies arranging them so that the fruit tarts did no to completely crush the Cream puffs and balancing the delicate torte on top. With everything cradled in my arms i stepped out into the rain which had become a Little heavier. I got almost Halfway Home before i sneezed. Of course the Black Forest torte plopped onto the pavement. Fortunately the rain was so hard by then that the whipped Cream and cherries washed away very quickly. An elderly woman passed with a look of disgust even fear. That a when i realized my nose was running hideously. I tried to get a tissue out of my purse without putting Down the umbrella. No Good. The tarts fell off and when i lunged to save them the Apple strudel slipped out the Bottom. After i acc Dently stepped in the tarts i noticed How much easier that made it for the rain to Wash them away. So i stepped on the strudel Loo. Then the umbrella broke. The paper around the top Cream puff quickly soaked through and dribbled a smear of goo Down the front of my coat. I shoved a soggy croissant into each pocket clasped the last Cream puff to my breast and sprinted nose and hair dripping through the torrential rain. As i stood panting inside my front door i discovered that the croissants were smashed Flat and embedded with wet paper. I threw them away. The Cream puff was badly damaged too but i ate that sucker standing up. Five dollars for a Bagger no i done to think that a excessive. Ellon no Mark is a Iroe Lanco Arllof living in Sindo Fingon Germany what did you say no doubt you have had a funny or embarrassing moment while trying to talk like a native. Whether it was in Greece Spain Turkey Belgium the Netherlands Iceland Germany or anywhere else you May have been yes even the United kingdom wed like to hear about it. Send your Best stories to slip of the Tongue sunday Magazine the stars and stripes Apo 09211. Well share our favourites in a future Issue. Feedback what is the most exciting thing you did this summer pfc. Vasilios Kalaitzidis army information systems come Synop Turkey getting stationed in Synop. You go downtown there once and that a the Only time you have to go. There a nothing to see. Staff sgt. Carl l. Taylor 515th trans co ludwigs Burg Germany i was in Virginia and went to a military school a a Basic non commissioned officer course. While there i did quite a bit of travelling in the states. Tech. Sgt. Elizabeth r. Weinhold c-5 Crew member with Active duty reserves Dover fab Del my world turned upside Down when desert shield happened. In be been on a Bunch of missions Down to saudi a its continuous. James m. Cobb employee of Stuttgart High school living in Remsick Germany i guess it would be right before All my friends left for the states we spent a lot of time together we had a lot of fun. Pfc. Ken Myers 164th my co Miclau Germany going to the super Rock �?T90 concert in Mannheim and being close enough to have a Rosmith Lead Singer Steven Tyler spit on me. Compiled by stars and stripes staff october 21,1990 sunday to plus c