European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 25, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Mike Arnold left worries about his wife sgt. Karen Arnold who is in saudi Arabia a in a sure some Guys Are going behind closed doors and shedding tears a says sgt 1st class Herb Ruffin. His wife sgt. Gai Ruffin is also participating in desert storm. The husbands left behind a amps photos Gus Schuettler by Randy Mcclain. Staff writer. A a a a b Ernie Gill is a changed Man. A it a five weeks ago when the first shots we a fired in anger in the persian Gulf Gill was died in knots. He spent several sleepless nights in a a a of squirming on a hide a Way bed in his living. Room listening to late night news reports describe the a bombing of Baghdad. A v a every few minutes his eyes would gaze toward the 1 Telephone at his Side most nights  t ring and he d wonder How his army wite was faring in the saudi  a arabian desert two time zones away. Quot i was so depressed and upset about what was. Going on that i did t feel like doing anything said Gill -36, whose wife capt. Marjorie Cox Gill of Stuttgart s 14th military police brigade is a logistics officer in the a a desert. A a v a. Gill one of an untold number of americans living in Europe with  near the front lines said he was constantly worried about his spouses safety the hardest part though was that Gill  find anyone. A to talk to about his fears. A a a wives of service members seemed standoffish at first he said in an interview in late january and some military men with wives in the Gulf Region did t seem to have a. Time for him.  a a a. A. A a a a As a civilian and a male spouse Gill said he Felt like Quot an overlooked part of the military  a lot of times male soldiers Don t really understand where i m Corning from and some of the wives done to. A a really know How to Deal with a Guy in my position Quot said Gill an sex air Force enlisted Man who s been Quot a House a husband Quot since his wife was transferred to Germany from fort Hood Texas three years ago. A. Today however Gill said he feels More at ease. He attributes his improved state of mind to the fact that he. Went to work As a Volunteer at the Robinson Barracks family support Center in Stuttgart Germany one \ month ago. Since going there Gill said he s met other men and women with spouses at War and he realizes he a not alone. A a Quot Quot i done to feel the isolation nearly As bad As i once did Quot he said. Quot i feel silly that j did t realize How Many people i had that i   a. A a a x a. A -. Nancy Cook comm Unity support officer for the a Stuttgart military Community said Gill is one of her Community s Success stories but she wonders How. A Many other husbands might be out there struggling with emotional concerns and not asking for help. A to be disappointed if there Are people who need assistance and they re not seeking us out Quot she said in Stuttgart two meetings for. Male spouses had been held through the end of last week taut Only one Man showed up to talk at each session Cooke said. The most poorly attended round table for wives attracted 30 women Stuttgart still intends to hold occasional. A meetings for husbands despite its poor track record. Cook said. A a. ,. Quot they husbands Are not used to saying can sit a Down and talk with you to expect them All at once to want to do that is unrealistic Quot Cook said. A Quot its a strange role a agreed army Community service Counselor Sandra Mccrary who works at the. Pattonville family support Center also in Stuttgart. Quot we be never had this Type of locus before. We be always thought of spouses As just  v a a several military arid civilian husbands with wives on Active duty in saudi Arabia believe they re making just. As great an adjustment on the Home front As soldiers wives but for the most part the men say they re coping with the changes. V a 1. It a a 7 some husbands said they re not  meetings for men simply because they re too Busy. Holding their households together to go out after duty a hours. V i m playing the role of or. Mom Quot said capt. Fred Schute of tiie 6th area support group in Stuttgart a a Schute who has a 20-month-old daughter juggles his chores at work along with child car amp duties at Home he said he has t had much time for any filing else since his wife sgt. 1st class Barbara l. Schuttz. Was sent to saudi Arabia two months ago. \.i. Can t leave my daughter Jennifer alone Quot he sad. Adding that he a had Only one evening out for a Quick pizza dinner since the War began. A a Page 14 the stars and stripes monday february