European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - March 3, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Navel buildup what to do about belly Button lint Jerry Zezima the Stamford Conn advocate in a the kind of Guy who likes to keep a clean Bellybutton 1 just thought you a like to know that in Light of the recent reve lotion that 28 percent of All men in the United states never clean the lint out of their navels. A ���?T.�. It s shocking hut True. According to menus health Magazine which apparently is running Low on Story ideas nearly three out of every 10 american men never bother to perform Navel maintenance. A a in the plus Side 42 percent do clean their bal a buttons on a regular basis though women will Tell you that they  bother because most of them throw their lint on the floor. Curiously menus health did not account for the remaining 30 percent. Maybe  have belly by Lions. _ a in any Case these statistics arc even More shocking when you consider that there must be at Betty Boope a Back 60 years old but you d never know it. Page 15. A Havana a starring Robert Redford is one of the new films on the circuit this month. Page 11. Least 3,000 tons of lint now silting in the navels of men across the nation. Think about it. Of the More than 250 million people in this country about half or 125 million Are males. Of this number it is a Safe guess that 100 million Are adults or men. Using simple mathematics which unfortunately never helps when i am trying to balance the Check Bokone can further calculate that 28. Million or 28 percent never clean their Bill but. Tons v a a  a a we know of course that lint is very Light having roughly the same density As the brain of the average congressman. But even the lightest substances can become weighty if allowed to build up. That is Why it is not unreasonable to assume that a Man who never cleans his Navel letting it go weeks months maybe even years has several ounces of lint in there. Converting ounces to pounds we begin to Sec How staggering these figures really arc. Knowing that there arel6 ounces in a Pound we can estimate that even a Man with say Only 4 ounces of lint in his Navel is carrying around a Quarter Pound of the stuff. This is the same As a Large Burger at Mcdonald a without the pickles of course at any rate one Quarter of 28 million is 7 million meaning that men who done to clean their navels have approximately 7 million pounds or 3,500 tons of lint in their Bill buttons. That raises a pertinent question How can they lug All that stuff around does no to it make walking to the refrigerator for another Beer rather difficult. A contents observations .3 Gulf War is fodder for entertainers. Hare care creates unexpected problems from the cover�?z.�?z4 army s top female athlete chases big goals feature .5 it with a purpose. New Way to train Home front .6 too Many floppies try a hard disk _ what do you think of Media s War coverage science and the world.? new evidence on the dinosaurs killer at a glance Yemen. Too a. 89 insider dissects politics behind War James j. Kilpatrick on a Good Lead Odds amp ends. 10 cheap thrills help fight off boredom. Genealogy and Horoscope to pms ill hats coming to the movie circuit in March television listings .12-14 local Cable and satellite schedules on television. 15 macgyver and Betty Boop a what a week on videos. 16 reviews of the latest videos to briefs 1? luke1 is by icky a China Beach is ending this weeks Helms. 18-19 silence of the lambs Quot a a super chiller Complete cafes circuit listing classified ads 20-23last laughs. 24 Dave Barry cartoons from around the world the answer obviously is that some men would rather walk around with the equivalent of a hamburger in their  listen to their wives complain about their slovenly habit of dropping lint All Over the floor. And face it men we Arentt very careful about where we leave the stuff sure Many of us will attempt to drop it in the wastebasket. But the lint invariably floats away from the Basket and Falls to the floor along with about 25 other pieces of lint that have piled up since the last time someone vacuumed. Same goes for the lint that gets stuck Between our toes when we take our socks off. This usually happens when we Are getting ready . But instead of getting up and walking across the room to the wastebasket Matiy of us just pick the lint from our feet and drop it on the floor. Personally. I prefer to stash it under the bed. That Way my wife does no to find it. Speaking of wives it would be interesting to a know How much lint women have in their belly buttons. Menus health did no to say but i bet it Isnit much. A a a a. A a a a a a. A a a a. That a because women have smaller navels than men. I mean women on average Are smaller than men so it Only stands to reason that their Bill buttons Are smaller. Not that women Don t collect lint in them. In a sure they do. Except they throw it in the waste a Basket. A a a a a a a a a  a a a a a. A a a a a but the big question is How Are we Ever going to get rid of 3,500 tons of the stuff -. I think we should wait till Spring Aid cart it All to the dump. At least that s  throwing it on the floor. A if you use a Gas mask in your Job Why nut when you exercise Page 6 sunday is a weekly supplement of the stars and stripes editors John Taylor Sarah Bottorff a Art director Wes Booher production Lisa Williams Denise Adams editorial assistance Louis Pierce Marian Hamilton a sunday March 3, 1991