European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - October 03, 1985, Darmstadt, Hesse Review Neuhof has some ups and Downs by sgt ret Clement Lounder the trouble with relatives is that just when you Start getting real comfortable with the idea of living 6,000 Miles away from them they show up. They catch some cheap package tour and they appear real suddenly like sweat 01 a Boxer s lip. One minute you re sitting there with a brew maybe watching the tube maybe trying to cop a Peck at the cleavage of Bobbie Battista and the next thing you know your brother is right there in the living room with you trying to stiff you for taxi fare from the Airport. You re trying to look pleased. You re trying to act excited. But you Are secretly asking yourself Why in the hell did my brother who was no great shakes As a kid and has not improved much have to come visit me and it is guaranteed that just when you turn to hug your sister in Law Bobbie Battista will lean Down real close to the Mike and you will miss it All. So it was with my buddy very Vern Decateur. Very Vern who was so much like his father Vern or. That the family figured calling him Vern or. Just was t enough had planned on spending his vacation deep sea fishing but it was not to be. He was Ai Home cleaning his reels and polishing up a Hopkins lure when he got a Call from the Airport. His sister Jolt in Decateur sprig had arrived. To visit. Probably for a Long while. The truth of the matter is that Joleen had recently divested herself of or. Sprig an event that had taken place Only after she found him to be partaking of certain pleasures that married people generally renounce at the altar. Texas being a joint property state the Man has to give up All the property or he gets sent to the joint Joleen had done nicely enough to finance an extended vacation in Europe. Now very Vern is no fool. He May have eyebrows that grow together in a single line across the top of his face and he May think threading a night Crawler onto a two ought Hook is your Basic hot Way to spend a couple weeks leave but he is no fool. Within hours very Vern had Joleen booked onto just about every bus tour itt has Ever cooked up. Including the four Day shopping trip to i think Lisbon that was Lewing the following morning. What very Vern needed was a Way to kill the evening a Way to get Joleen fed and amused until the Jet lag could kick in. And being no fool very Vern turned to yours truly the menu master. I settled on the Hof gut Neuhof outside of Frankfurt. Five Hundred years ago it was the country Home of someone who was obviously holding some major assets. Now it is a restaurant Riding stable Duck Pond bakeshop kind of place that is real impressive to folks who like Joleen figure the Liberty Bell is one of the 10 greatest sights in the world. The whole place is a Tad smaller than Robinson Barracks in Stuttgart and the restaurant part is like a big country inn with fireplaces lots of wooden Fidel photo Jotten orca True in the Hof gut Neuhof outside of Frankfurt is a Good place to take Tolki visiting from the states. Beams and chandeliers. The kind of place where you re basically not going to be surprised if Robin Hood strolls in and orders a couple of brews for himself and the Jolly men who i personally have always been very suspicious of. We had reservations for 7 p.m., but we were close to an hour late due to the fact that Joleen was trying to repair a Dent in her coiffure. Still when we finally trooped in the Young Man at the door told us he d held our table. Knowing he was probably going to miss watching fish do the death Jerk on the end of a 15-Pound line very Vern immediately ordered the Trout which our waiter de boned and put into a bowl full of some kind of Cream sauce. Very Vern said it was done Well. Joleen had gone for the Vor Speiss Wagon which is sort of a rolling smorgasbord about the size of my Volkswagen Beetle thai they push up to your table and that comes with a staff of at least four. The service was impressive but the Little foods wore Only fair Joleen said. I went for the Duck liver which comes with a tiny Blotch of currant Jelly an some chunks of Melon. The Neuhof makes its own Pate and bakes its own bread makes its own wine etc., Etc and it was very Good. About a seven on the International one to 10 scale. We did t try it but a Guy at the next table one of them German Hunter types with Short pants and bad Teeth who kept smiling wicked like at Jolee ngot the rep Afefe which is a Venison Pate that is supposed to be served in a thin pastry Shell but which was done Here on bread. Sort of an open faced Deer meat Sandwich. It looked pretty Good. Main courses Joleen May not be a great thinker she still thinks a cuisinart is something you can see at the louvre but she is a very spirited lady and to prove it she insisted on trying something that is not like tax mex in any she ended up with Phi fierling German mushrooms served in a Cream sauce and gave them very High Marks. Very Vern was torn Between the pork medallions they come in a tarragon sauce which sounded interesting and the filet and settled on the latter which was served in a Black Pepper sauce. About an eight he said. Both Joleen and very Vern also got potato Bill Chen which roughly translated Means Little balls but which were not very Little. If you can imagine a dumpling about the size of a Cand Lepin Bowling Ball we re singing from the same Sheet music Here. I had slices of meat that was supposed to be Lamb but that came from an animal that was very lose to being a full grown sheep if you understand what i m saying. It came with mint Jelly Home made Anil very Good Gren Boans undercooked and slabs of new potatoes not bad. Jolt in and i split a 19b3 chateau Moulin do Picur easy to pick out because the Neuhof Only has three dry French red wines and one is Viry cheap and another is very expensive and the Moulin is right in the Middle. Very Vern Sulci try from the assortment of open wines and i did t hear any complaints. The three of us also got the famous which is supposed to be a dessert souffle Bill which the Neuhof docs with ice Cream and candied Orange Peel and slivered almonds and whipped Cream. Damn tasty. The next Day very Vern and me figured out our rating. Service is Good and the food is Good very Good in a few places. But the place is kind of pricey nearly 250 Marks for the three of us. And we were a Little suspicious of the fact that we kept seeing the chefs walking around the Garden outside the restaurant windows. I can Only Hope that this is not where the Duck liver comes from. Still As i mentioned higher up in this column the Neuhof is the perfect place to take people just off the plane who you Are trying o impress. Hof gut Neuhof is outside the town of Dree cd Godtz Echain off Highway a 6s1, just South of Frankfurt and not far from the Airport. For reservations Call 06102-3214. Very Vern and me give the Neuhof 311 pointy fingers. Ratings 1 & the is & awesome eats. We re talking Paradise on a plate Here. In j & is very Fine dining. Crack service and memorable food and drink. H b solid Chow. Good food of atmosphere and pleasant service. Ujj decent. About equal to a Ponderosa Steak House. 2 path butt. Crummy Chow so so service Semi ratty Interior. October 3, ims stripes Magazine 17
