European Stars And Stripes (Newspaper) - October 16, 1986, Darmstadt, Hesse Columns does anybody know How to play this game by John Windrow Magazine editor i Don t know if you gentle readers Are aware of it but m the Magazine editor these Days it was a monumental career move for me one thai i m sure has been followed eagerly by journalistic Powers be nil Over the Globe. Amazing that cb5 would Elenn House and change its top management at almost he same instant i took Over stripes. Life is funny i hat . This is howl came Clown. I la probably write a Book about this with David i have time the old Magazine editor quil so she could return in Texas. She spent three years looking All i iwo Europe fora decent Plite of enchiladas and ref Rii a Beans finally ran up i i while Flag and said Adios. After she gave her notice about 30 seconds alter the editor came Stunf Lins Over to my disk where i Wai Furi Ciu ily headlines in. You re he new some ire Burr , vome achieve greatness in try same Gri Olney thrust upon them shake set inc s words rambled through my Skull when i realized ihi1 responsibility Hail been thrust upon me in such an untimely fashion. The news desk chief was inconsolable but accepted the inevitable. He told me could Lake my dictionary and head for the features department any time within the next five minutes. Don t you want me to stick around until the next deadline i said Well struggle along without you somehow he said As he eyed a photo of j giant tree climbing Frog that he planned to use on Page s. How Are you going to replace me i asked. He began to laugh hysterically. Deep grief often disguises itself As maniacal mirth. So there i was the Magazine editor. My Magazine experience is rather sketchy. I did put out a to Magazine once and it probably would have been fantastic if i had owned a television. I did t worry too much about it then and i saw no reason to let fear and common sense Dampen my enthusiasm for the great task before me. Now As everyone knows 98 percent of the magazines in the states Are written designed and produced for women. There if e two reasons for i his. First women spend the Money of a Guy needs u underwear he tries to gel the woman in Bis life logo buy it for him. Men Are i he weaker sen in some ways. Colossal malls filled with Vitzius sales people blaring tvs howling children running muck in ravaging packs and acres of displays of 36 d different kinds of u underwear at 36 different prices care i he hell out of them. I d father be beaten up by the hell s Angels than spend .1 saturday afternoon shopping for underwear. Clot Hes that you have to try on Are even worse. Not so with the ladles. They love i he action the thrills the spills running Chr Enikh i he crowels bruising shoulders and elbows Lirl ring fur hours Over a Black Leal tilt handbag or ,1 Green Scarf. So Ai Iver Isi is .1 ways want to by sure i hat a woman s hand picks up the Magaz inc. Two for some reason women ire More Likely to read s than men. This is a Ihie Ken and est question to me. Do More women read magazines because they like magazines belter than a in or do men not read magazines because the Only choices they have aside from porno Are National geographic Soldier of Fortune and porn wrestling review Well probably never know. 1 Don t know if any of this applies to my Job or not. I Don 1 have to worry about advertisers. We gel our Money from our bookstores. And i m not the brightest reporter on the Block but i be noticed a lot of men in the Mill airy. So what to do pitch the Marine to female readers like everyone else or try to p Ilch in to both sexes i talked to the features editor. Everybody she said. Pilch the Magazine to everybody. Travel the arts sports entertainment food personality pieces whatever is i wrote Down everybody and interesting in my trusty notebook. There s something else we need to talk about she said Clearing her Throat. What s thai Well she Saint Here in the features department we strive fora certain image a trendy Chic fashionable glad you mentioned that i suddenly interjected fashion. Thai s the ticket. People arc nuts about fashion. You think the paper would pay for me to cover the next big lingerie show in Paris i sprang the idea on two of the Guys in photo and they went nuts. Visual fast paced hype something for the Well see she said gently i was referring to your image i was sitting there in my Lucky shirt in Al i wore the Day i received my honorable discharge from the Navy my Lucky jeans that i was wearing when i was introduced to san Antonio and my Lucky Tennis shoes lha twas wearing when he made me the editor. I m big unlucky clothes. Dkl Lud Mustard on in from lunch. Anything wrong will my image i . She said we d talk soul that later. So this is what i m projecting for n Nuga Inelo inheres a everybody. My award winning column. Thai takes care of or. South Squirrel dogs Possum Hunts Moonshine fast cars stories overheard in Low rent bars the Battle Between the sexes the airing of wildly irrational prejudices and making fun of whales television and Princess i. I la keep miss manners just to be polite. And i la iry to touch All the bases. One Page will be How to have your baby in the Barracks and the next will be dressing a Deer in the Field with your i m even willing to t How in a few animal photos. Something for everybody. Nothing else if not Eclectic that s our motto gentle readers. I la be sure to let everyone know if i figure out what i m doing. Show a Little compassion for your pos Seq s sex by miss manners United future Syndicate. Dear miss manners i share a haute with my Fossq Penan of the opposite sex sharing living Quarter and Hii 14-year-old son. The boy s Mother live in another City but is Here on famines approximately one week out of every five or six. When they were married the and my pos Seq occupied the House he and 1 now share. She sees her Ion whenever possible generally picking him up and taking him out to dinner and we have no objection whatsoever to that. However on several occasions i have innocently bounded Down the stain of our Home and with no prior warning found my pos Seq s sex visiting and chatting with her ton in our living room. I contend Thalia she Wilshe to use our Home the should Call and inquire if this it a convenient time to visit my pos Seq contends thit she is the guest of his ton and need Only Clear her visit with him. I feel that 1 she a in a special category of guest 2 since these visit take place in the common living areas and not the privacy of the boy s room which is usually in a typical teen Ager dishevelled state they affect us and 3 it is uncomfortable for me to be caught completely unaware thai my pos Seq s sex is in our Home. So miss manners should we expect a request when she wishes to use our Home or perhaps my pos Seq s son should inform us that his Mother wishes to visit him she usually Calls him and just announces to him that she is coming i recognize the Strong Bond Between Mother and son but do we not have any rights at All where our Home is concerned gentle Reader what do you mean we a the two other persons with whom you Are sharing living quarters seem to agree perfectly. Miss manners agrees with them that limiting the boy s privilege of entertaining his own Mother in his own Home would make in Clear to him that this is no longer really his Home. She acknowledges that in is your Home too. You do have the right to ask the boy to Check with you before scheduling visits and if it is seriously inconvenient to ask him to see her elsewhere. Miss manners just advises you against exercising this right beyond the formality of asking to be informed. If the Mother Only comes to own once every five or six weeks and she generally lakes him out we Are talking about perhaps four limes a year. There does nol seem to be any question of her acting As if the House were still Hen or taking the Opportunity to confront you you Don l even seem to know she is there unless you happen to walk into the room miss manners asks you As an adult to consider the inconvenience to you of having a quiet Chat going on in your living room four limes a year As against the inconvenience to a child of having nowhere private he can be with his Mother. She believes thai the two persons with whom you Are sharing living quarters also expect an adult not to mention compassionate answer from you. Dear miss manners when 1 became a Mother at the age of 18,1 was incensed on receiving a letter from my daughter s 25-year-old it addressed to the child and proclaiming her happiness at finally having a Little was i wrong in being annoyed i should i have assumed the role of the infant and replied t chose to. Regard it As a temporary i hoped menial aberration on her part hut it seems i a wrong because she then expressed her desire to have the child Call her we obliged to the extent of using aunt gentle Reader mental aberrations of whatever duration that arise from fondness for one s children should not be treated As offences no matter How to the letter by apologizing for the fact that your daughter is not Yel handling her own correspondence and promising thai you will put her aunt s letter on the top of the pile to be answered As soon As she is. October
