European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 1, 1990, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Ann Landers dear Ann Landers i am a 25-Ycar-old woman who has been dating the same Man Tor two years. We both have Many casual acquaintances but Are basically loners. Quot Dennis Quot and i enjoy Solitude. We each need our own space and feel smothered by too much togetherness. We do not live together nor do we see each other or talk every Day. This arrangement seems Odd to our friends but it suits us just Fine. Here s the question i would like to marry Dennis this year or next but i have no desire to live with him. I am Happy sharing an apartment with my two roommates but my ultimate goal is to have a place of my own. Dennis has let me know that he has no burning desire to share his living quarters with either a Lover or a wife. We agree that we d get on each other s nerves if we were together night and Day. I be told people at work that my idea of the perfect arrangement would be for Dennis and me to marry and live in the same apartment building or a Block or two apart. They say i am crazy and that i cannot possibly be in love with the Guy. With the divorce rate at 50 percent it is obvious that living together does t help solidify relationships. Our unmarried friends who live with to Cir significant others Don t appear to be All that Happy. They argue a lot. Do fewer things together and seem bored with one another. The idea of married couples living apart is not Origi Nal with me. I showed Dennis an article about a couple who lived together Tor four years fought like cats and dogs moved into separate apartments and it saved their relationship. Am i crazy. Ann a Cynthia in Atlanta dear Cynthia Why do you feel it is necessary to poll your friends about a matter that is so intensely personal if you and Dennis agree that Yov d like to marry and live in separate dwellings whose business is it the Only hitch i see is if you decided to have children. Where would they live if you Haven t thought this far ahead i recommend it. Dear Ann Landers. I be never seen my grievance in your column. I need to vent my irritation resulting from a recent incident and ask if my response was appropriate. I was invited to dinner at the Home of a new Friend. I wore Dressy Slacks and a fancy sweater. When i arrived at the House there was a note on the door. It said. A we have a tradition in this Home of removing our shoes before we enter. Will you please do the same Quot i am not the Barefoot Type and Felt insulted by this request. Also going without shoes totally dressed Dow n what i was wearing. While the hostess wore moccasins. I was forced to spend hours in my nylo Ned feet. I suppose the reason for the request is to preserve her carpet but is her carpet More precious than mine is preserving her carpet More important than making her guests feel Welcome of course i followed the instructions. But i Felt resentful. Did i overreact what do you think about this weird routine a vexed in Vancouver dear vexed in Van insulting no. Odd yes. In my opinion you did overreact but fit bet you won t be going Over there again so what difference does it make c creators Syndicate the stars and stripes a Page 11 letters is this your Little girl this picture was part of a Roll sent to the stars and Roll is of Christmas Day. If they arc your pictures. Stripes by an Anonymous writer who evidently write to letters to the i editor the stars and stripes thought we could find the rightful owners. The entire Apo . 09211. Housing official says proposal has Merit when we move out of our family housing quarters we Are required to leave them the same Way we found them painted Walls and cabinets must be repainted White wallpaper must be removed Etc. My question is Why my own quarters have been painted and Wall papered beautifully and i receive a lot of compliments on their appearance. I am sure that most incoming families would prefer the a a renovations i be done instead of those ugly White Walls and White cabinets. Many people have also told me this this Isnit just my opinion. So i have a suggestion. Why not show incoming families the improvements a previous family has made and if they like them keep them if they done to like them of course the family would be required to restore the quarters to its previous appearance. If the newcomers accepted the appearance they would then be responsible for removing the renovations if the family after them did no to like it. There is no doubt in my mind that most people would prefer Nice colors to drab White. A name withheld Wiesbaden a West Germany editors note a Donald p. Grassi housing management specialist housing division office of the Deputy chief of staff Engineer he Usa eur replies your suggestion has Merit and communities will be encouraged to implement it whenever possible. Show ing Pride of ownership during occupancy of government controlled family housing is greatly encouraged. A More tips for making Bike Riding Safe a recent writer made some excellent comments in his letter to the editor. Yes. Failing to Wear a helmet is the cause of a Large number of head injuries for cyclists. Bike helmet safely is a matter of importance because it affects a Large percentage of the population. Not wearing proper bicycle gear is a major cause of Many accidents and fatal incidents that occur every year. We must Stop these preventable injuries. Taking a few minutes to ensure your Bike is in top operative condition is a vital part of bicycle safety. To make cycling a Safe and enjoyable Pursuit you should Wear reflective garments and a properly filling bicycle helmet. Cafes can help with Bike safely by stocking a w Ider selection of helmets that will fit a larger Cross Section of the population. There arc several standards whose approval signifies that the product has been Laboratory tested. All bicycle helmets should meet the Snell Ana Ansi z90.-i guidelines. Here Are some hints for helmet selection. A if you let your children select their own helmets then they will be More Likely to use them. Helmets should fit securely and rest level on the head without moving around. Chin straps and foam sizing inserts will ensure a better fit. A to protect the hard outer Shell clean helmets with soap and water Only. A parents must help their children develop the habit of wearing a helmet at All times. Remember if we act safely Ihen we live safely. A Alexia m. Shepherd Vicenza Italy european edition Coc. Oene e. Townsend. Usan commander editor in chief it. Coc Suzanne i Phillips. Usan Deputy commander de Tor in Covel Marie Kominicki of at Proctor Deane s. Mcdermott Pio Ducton manager managing editor circulation manager True newspaper i an authorized unofficial publication Lor members of the pm diary services overseas. Contents of the stars and stapes Are not necessarily the official views of. Or endorsed by. The u s government the department of defense or the u s european command the appearance of advertising m this pub Catton. Including inserts or supplements does not constitute endorsement by the department olt defense or the stars and Snipes of the products or services advertised everything advertised in this publication shall be made available for Purchase use or patronage without regard to race color Elk too. Be. National Ong a age. Merita Radatus. 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