European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - July 22, 1990, Darmstadt, Hesse J. King Cruger a when you live in Italy it helps to know who the saints Are who can intercede on your behalf Italy has hosts of saints Al virtually unknown elsewhere who guide the destiny of its citizens. Afew americans have Ever heard of san Sal vac Ranio. Yet thousands of italian motorcyclists All scoffers at the Law mandating the wearing of helmets Are Alyc today because their Patron protected cranium in crashes. Some saints appear to have less clout than others. For example san Par Cheggin Patron Saint of motorists who entrust cars to parking lot attendants has Little Success in thwarting the theft of late Model Bow s and Mercedes. San Oss Gennaro who ensures individual safety in crowds gets mixed Marks for results. The Saint fares Well when it comes to protecting fans in soccer crowds but flops miserably guarding wallets and purses from thieves cruising streets and Public transport. When it comes to racking up impressive re suits one Saint stands head and Halo above All the rest san nicotine the Patron of italian Gas pump jockeys yearly protects millions of fatten wants and their unwary customers from instant incineration. The Good Saint does no to ordinarily watch Over All service station attendants. Instead he keeps a watchful Eye on those attendants who casually puff on cigarettes while pumping gasoline. In Southern Italy especially in the Naples area smokers appear to constitute the overwhelming majority of petrol pumpers. In order to arrive at such strange staffing help wanted ads surely must read a non smokers need not apply during the Cool Damp Days of Winter when the Flash Point of gasoline is Low san nicotine has Little to do. He rests. Watches sky Channel but As the weather warms san nicotine a workload geometrically increases until by the dog Days of july and August the Saint is the busiest dude in heaven. He has to be or natives and tourists alike would bake like so Many crusty pizzas. Picture this summer sunday scenario Momma Poppa and the Bambino Are crammed into a Fiat Uno. They Stop at Guido a super service for Gas on a Day so sweltering that mirages hover above the Highway. Guido lighted Biggie dangling Leech like from his lip pumps Gas into the fits gasoline fumes dance out of the tank swirl around Guido a Waist leap up towards the Biggie and. Nothing happens. San nicotine has acted to keep Guido Momma Poppa and the Bambino from turning into Post Toa sties. So when you cruise Down to Italy for a Little ramp a have no fear of immolation at the pumps san nicotine is watching Over you. And More importantly Over Guido. No cruder is a staff writer in stars and stripes Medtleran-1 Bureau. Sunday c Page 7
