European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 10, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Stupid behaviour is a big part of being a male Dave Barr Knight Ridder newspaper or topic today in our continuing Sam m pics on Guys is Why Guys act Macho. A m one recent morning i was driving vow in Miami on interstate 95, which should have a sign that says warning High testosterone Levels nextl5 Miles a a a. A a a a a a. A a in the left Lane one behind the other were two Well dressed Middle age men both driving luxury Telephone equipped German automobiles. They looked like responsible business executives probably named Roger with Good jobs and Nice families and male pattern baldness the kind of Guys whose most violent physical activity on an aver. Age Day is stapling. They were driving normally except that the Guy in front rag conc wax4houghtlcssly going Only a about 65 Miles an hour which in Miami is the Speed limit normally observed inside car washes so Roger two pulled up closer until the two cars were approximately one Electron apart and honked his Horn. Of course Roger one was not about to stand for that. You let a Guy honk at you and you arc basically admitting that he has a bigger stapler. So Roger one stomped on his brakes forcing Roger two to swerve onto the shoulder where showing presence of mind in a emergency he was. Able to make obscene gestures with both hands. At this Point both Rogers accelerated to approximately 147 Mph and began weaving violently from Lane to Lane through dense Rush hour traffic each risking numerous lives in an Effort to get in. \ front of the other screaming and getting spit All Over their Walnut dashboards. I quickly lost sigh of them but i bet neither one backed Down. Their co workers probably wondered what happened to them. Quot where the Heck is Roger a they probably said later that morning unaware that even As they spoke the duelling Rogers still Only inches apart were approaching the Canadian Bor. Der. A a a a. A a a a ,�.����. A this is not unusual Guy behaviour. One time in Washington d.c., traffic Jam i saw Jwo Guys also driving Nice cars reach a Point where their lanes were supposed to merge. But neither one would yield so they very slowly a we arc talking maybe 1 Mph drove into each  examples of pointlessly destructive or hurtful Macho Guy behaviour include a Guys at sporting events getting into shoving matches and occasionally sustaining fatal heart attacks Over such issues As who was next in line for pretzels. A �.1. A. A a a a a a. A Guys on the Street making Mouth noises at women. A boxing. A a foreign policy. Why do Guys do these things one possible explanation is that they believe women arc impressed. In fact however most women have the opposite reaction to Macho behaviour you rarely hear women say things like a Norm when that vending machine failed to give you a three mus act cars bar and you punched it so hard that you broke your hand and we had to go to the Hospital instead of to my Best friends daughters wedding i became so filled with lust for you that 1 nearly tire off All my clothes right there in . By room. Ano women Are far More Likely to say a Norm you have the brains of an odor   but the real explanation for Macho behaviour is not that Guys Are stupid. The real explanation is that because of Complex and Subtle hormone based chemical reactions occurring in their brains  act stupid. This is True throughout the animal kingdom where you have examples such As male elks who instead of simply flipping a Coin will bang their Heads against each other for hours to Sec who gets to mate with the female Elk who is on the sidelines filing her nails and wondering How she Ever / a. N a. 0l0 Warsaw Poland no kidding 7 entertainers who changed names completely Rita Hayworth a from Marguerite Cansino Patti Page a from1 Fowler Steve Lawrence a from Sidney Leibowitz / Mike Connors a from Krekor Ohanian Conway Twitty a from Harold Lloyd Jenkins Vic Damone from Vito Farinola Jimmy Dean a from Seth Ward source world features Syndicate. Got hooked up with such a Moron species until eventually she gets bored and wanders off to bed. Meanwhile the Guy elks keep banging into each other until one of them finally a wins a although at this Point his brain which was not exactly a steel trap to begin with is so badly damaged that in his confusion he will mate with the first object he encounters including shrubbery which is Why you see so few baby elks  example of Macho animal behaviour is Guy dogs who arc so dumb they make elks look like Rhodes scholars. Every male dog firmly believes that if he makes wee wee in enough places he will be declared dominant male dog of the in tire Earth and receive a plaque plus valuable dog prizes such As a bag of Chicken Heads. Of course since there arc several billion dogs in the Competition everybody is extremely Busy trying to stay ahead of everybody else. One time i took a hike on a Mountain with two male dogs a named Rubio and Moo Shu. Every three minutes Rubio would carefully select a spot and establish his dominance Over it then Moo Shu would come sprinting from As far As a mile away so that despite having the entire Mountain to choose from he could establish his dominance Over the same 4 Square inches previously dominated by Rubio who by now was several Hundred Yards away dominating a new spot which Moo Shu would then frantically Spring toward arid so on All Day Long with each dog absolutely convinced that he was the baddest Hombre on the planet. A a at least we human males done to do that. We done to need to. We Havre tanks Reisinger Zagreb. Yugoslavia Page 24 c sunday february 10 1991