European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - November 07, 1993, Darmstadt, Hesse This week s fiems Short takes aria to it it to i j. Richard Prev Fuji acid Emilio pc velvet Star if Seattle police detective who Long with Rosie o Donnell must pose it in up kale family to locate in a mob trial. Pm r. That s Short for cell bloc the new Pri. Of Home of notorious character called gusto Chiti Rock and Allen Payne. r. Sylvester Stallone it an expert Mountaineer who puts hit skill to the test when an air plane crash lands in the Rockies. Din Aykroyd a Jane Cunin reprise their Sigurd tar Wight list Tolet. T of Mallart Man r. Cop Sylvester Stallone and villain Wesley snipe Are cryogenically Froien for their respective crimes. Yean later the . Again when snipe it set free and Stallone is the Only cop who can top him. ". Of Artra Cha manae to. Walter m a Theu and Christopher Lloyd. Drif Hipfl Ima lottery Foll introducing Jason Scott Lee no relation. Ratha Maatz to i j. A lovable Crook of dad Patrick Wayte Springs hit kid from in abusive child care Init Tutich. Tali flt r. A Young lawyer Geti caught Between big firm and the Fri. Tom Cruite. Or Woff to i j. A boy Jawn James Richter with troubled past Bonds with Kilter whale. To fief Flora to i j. A Eri a and jolting Feu drama that Krewin the tension tight. Harrison Ford and Tommy a Jonet. Quarty tilt r. Don Johnson give a most con. Rinsing performance n Sleazy Hunter. Mae a Paana to. Bette Midler Sarah Jessica Parker and Kathy Najimy Vamp it up at oth Cen Tury witches returned to haunt modern time. Muratala Lirk pg-13. A sure Oscar nominee for special effects. Last a flan mar to i j. Austin o Brien Playa Young movie fan who joins his favorite movie her Arnold Schwarzenegger on screen. Tva Madayn America pg-13. Whoops Goldberg and Ted Dawn Star in sitcom style comedy about i woman who finds her father through a sperm Bank. Made r. Alec Baldwin Bill Pullman and Nicole Kidman Star in this so so thriller that seems mostly rehashed from earlier thrillers. Them wet Fiat pg-13. Story about Friendship that develops Between fatherless 12. Year old Nick Stahl wonderful actor and i disfigured Recluse Mel Gibson. Marta a ii Etty r. Menace plunges us into the harsh and deadly world of the inner City. La Reni Tat and Jad Pinkett. Tit Matazar Man pm. Robert Townsend wrote directed and starred in this inner City fantasy about a schoolteacher who is hit by a meteor and acquires superpowers. Or. Wana awful Po-13. Romantic comedy starring Matt Dillon and Annabel Sciorra Naa Alf us thing r. Stephen King s Best seller about a demonic gift shop owner who play on greed to reduce cattle Rock Maine to bloody chaos. Mat von Synow and Leland gaunt we palate Jua Lea pm. Writer director John sin Gleton followed up his impressive debut Boyi n the blood. With this new drama starring Janet Jackson. Nakla of Iha Yaar pm. Fantasy about a 12. Year old Thomas Ian Nicholas who pitches the Chicago cubs to the world series championship. Slam Alana in Saatela to Tom Hank stars As widower in Seattle whose Bright Young Ion Rosa Malinger goes to great length to find the perfect woman Meg Ryan for Hia dad. A. Irva r. Sharon Slont plays successful single woman who moves into High Rise Little knowing it it the site of mysterious death. William Baldwin. A. Nas Wycha Ait in of Tami Warfa 19 7 animated classic. I. Pauty Shore mtg s syllable stretching Denizen of dudes Villa. Shocks South Dakota by showing up As the prospective husband of local Vale Jim Tozian turned la Butterfly. Ilk let Olat Awaa r. Diverting fast moving action filled mystery thriller to provide a solid role for Bruce Willis As a mightily Belc augured highly principled Pittsburgh cop. F my Marl Iraa. Pm. Bob Hopkins and John la Bunimo portray Nintendo s italian plumbers Hugo up against i villain played by Dennis hop per. Lurf no Njaa pm. Two brother ire aur Briard to learn they Are princes of a Island. Ernie Reyes jr., Leslie Nielsen tune Lac and Rob Schneider. So Tayt pg-13 Robin Williams Star at whimsical toy maker who must save his either t toy factory from demented Uncle Michael Gibbon who wants to convert the bus incest to firearms manufacturing. Wahan4 at Banta a a to. Sequel to in 1989 Sleeper comedy about i corps and i Iii a yup Piel. Wycal a Lav Oal to vhf m r. Tow Story at Rock v Roll legend Tina Turner. Angela Baycil m tint Turner and Laurence Fishbune u bad in. Ratings by Chuck Emch. Jim Gamey a Thompson and Erika Elenak Star in the Beverly jf./6f./e a movie remake of the 1960s to series. Chuck Vinch staff writer on movies Thoj Beverly Hillbillies rated pm 0 musts. Worth your urn passable coming Toon to a too outlast Noar you. And you can wait there s dumb there s dumber an there s dumbest. And then there s the a Everty Hillbillies. The inexorable baby Boomer nostalgia kick that has Hollywood recycling 60s to shows As feature films is not Likely to Abate anytime soon. But for sheer misguided ineptitude it will be Tough to top this Limp reworking of what is arguably the most obliviously banal to show of All time. Anyone who did t spend the 60s Ina tibetan monastery is familiar with the Saga of the Clampette a Backwoods Arkansas clan. While out one Day shooting at some food patriarch Jed Jim Varney strikes Oil allowing the Brood to move to Beverly Hills an Hobnob with the Rich and pretentious. The family includes nutty old Granny Cloris Leachman whose favorite Pas times include brewing homemade 100-proof tonic and snatching dead Ani Mal carcasses off the streets to make roadkill when she s not scratching an armpit daughter Ell Mac Erika Oleniak likes to Rassle wild bears and snotty High school boys her Hickory nut Cruncher is deadly. Dumber than dirt Cousin Jethro Diedrich Bader is also on hand As Are a unctuous banker or. Drysdale Dabney Coleman and his Gal Friday miss Hathaway Lily Tomlin the Story such As it is has to do with Jed s efforts to find a new wife who can refine his increasingly unruly Daugh Ter while two amoral swindlers Rob Schneider and Lea Thompson try to divest the Clampette of their consider Able wealth. Only two cast members emerge relatively unscathed. One of them Surpri singly is Varney. He has proved to be almost unbearable As his other alter ego Ernest p. Worrell ubiquitous to Pitchman and erstwhile Star of a string of exceedingly bad movies Ernest goes to Camp Ernest saves Christmas it Al. But he avoids overt embarrassment Here because the quartet of no name writers who fashioned this script Drew the role of Jed As straight Man for the Hij inks of the rest of the family. In his wildest dreams Varney could never Hope to master the perfect Deadpan de livery of buddy Ebsen who has a Cameo Here As his other to Persona Barnaby Jones. But he manages to handle the minimal responsibilities he is Given with a modicum of other cast member who rises above the material is Leachman appropriating the role that belonged to Irene Ryan and nudging it a notch up the parody scale. Whether slugging Down a swig of her tonic or treating nailing neighbor who has scarfed Down too much cheese Leachman is one of the film s very few Bright spots. The rest of the actors suffer mightily. Oleniak who has no comic timing an apparently woo the role because of the Way her ample physical charms can fallout tight clothes further cements her growing reputation As one of Holly Wood s All purpose bimbos. As for the others Bader plays stupid just a Tad too convincingly Colema seems to be trying to keep from Swal lowing his Mustache and Tomlin has not mugged so shamelessly since her Days on laugh in. Schneider is rapidly ascending to the top spot on my list of least favorite actors while Thompso snoozes through her role As if she were on Auto Pilot. The High Points relatively speaking Are few. One sem Clever scene involves a Cameo by Zsa Zsa Gabor implicated in a drive by police another decent gag has to do with whether Cousin the poor relation who occupies that big White House in Washington will be Able to attend Jed s nuptials. But the funniest scenes Are not eve part of the movie they re a series of bloopers that play As the closing credit Roll. When the outtakes Are 10 times funnier than the material that was purposely left in you know you have a tur key on your Ever a movie needed a laugh track to signal viewers that an alleged punch line just zipped by this is it. Half the gags Don t even seem to have punch lines As director Penelope Spheeris lurches from scene to scene with the subtlety of a Butcher. I can be As lowbrow As anyone the14 hours of the three stooges in my video collection is proof of that but this flick was too insipid even for me. I can t recall welcoming the end of a film with a greater sense of Relief. The Beverly Hillbillies gets the big fat Zero. Page 12 sunday november 7, 1993
