European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - May 22, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Miss manners Judith Martin dear miss manners my father always gets mad when my Little sister and i Brush our Teeth in the living room or other areas of the House. He says this is disgusting and  sister and i obviously done to agree with him. So can you Tell me is it impolite and disgusting it does no to seem like a big Deal Tome. Gentle Reader its always a big Deal when you disgust another person and when that person is your Parent subject to disgust in the Home you share it is a horrendously big  should be enough to get you and your sister scurrying Back to the bathroom. Dear miss manners can so Many hotels con Ven lion centers and country clubs be so insensitive and rude a or is it someone else i am referring to the use of telephones that Are strategically placed in hotel bathrooms. My work requires me to travel out of town frequently. I like to be efficient and frequently make Calls from these phones. A a a a. A. A a a these Calls Are sometimes to my Girlfriend who becomes offended when discovering where the Call has been placed. In my opinion her taking insult is unwarranted. I justify myself by referring to the hundreds of thousands of telephones in some of the most prominent hotels and country clubs. How could All these establishments be so rude is a bathroom Telephone for use or decor gentle Reader miss manners cannot quite see How a hotel As opposed to the people who work in a hotel can be rude although she hesitates to offer a Challenge. She has known convention centers that certainly tried. But equipment is just equipment it is How it is used that May be polite or rude. Etiquette rules apply Only to matters that affect other people. In order to be rude a rude action must be known to its target. Your Choice of Telephone Booths is therefore Only made rude when someone tells your Girlfriend where you Are when calling or gives her a clue of a nature miss manners does not care to dwell upon. Dear miss manners i was getting ready to throw a baby Shower for a longtime Friend and asked her to get the addresses for me. She said a a in a not throwing myself a baby Shower you re throwing it v for me. Its your Job to get the  whose duty is it if i do not know some of the guests attending How am i supposed to know How to get their addresses. Gentle Reader and How were you to know that your longtime Friend could be so rude miss Man ners admires you for not asking about the obvious solution which is to say a sorry i  find the guests so i suppose ill have to Call off the  of course a guest of Honor supplies addresses with the names of anyone she asks to have invited a or any other information or assistance for a Friend who is doing  a favor. The reason miss manners is grateful that you Are not trying to get out of the whole thing is that a baby who has such a selfish Mother is going to need All the help the poor thing can get. Dear miss manners i am divorced and asked to have my Maiden name restored. I received a card from my daughter addressed Quot miss a which she said when i brought up the Issue in a group of relatives i should use with my Maiden name. I pointed out that the title  is Correct for any woman single married or divorced. I am very Ini rated that i receive Many envelopes with no title before my name. A gentle Reader miss manners does no to like the absence of titles any More than you do but feels she must Point out that it is arguments like these that have made people give them up. While a multiple Choice situation exists it is always possible to get something a a wrong in the eyes of whoever chooses to Call it wrong and anything is better than listening. To squabbles Over what other people ought to Call themselves. 1 a Ems a is a Fine useful title that goes with any lady a name and if you want to use it your daughter and others should so address you. A a miss would have been Fine too if you had chosen it but you had not a a a Quot a r a dear miss manners i am 12 years old and during dinner at my friends birthday party i was , but everyone else was done. They went into the next room to unwrap presents. My Mother thinks that it was rude of me not to join them. T think it was rude of them to leave. Who is right gentle Reader nobody. Except your Mother of course and even she has been lax in her explanation. / Quot. .7 a a a a a she should have acknowledged As miss manners certainly does that your friends were rude in leaving the table while you were still eating. But etiquette requires not Only doing the right thing but also Mim Mizing errors in the name of social Harmony. Thus your reaction should not have been to remain firmly seated while the others who May not even have been aware that you were not finished left but to acquiesce in the decision that dinner was Over by Fot. Lowing them to the next activity. United feature Syndicate. Feeling incorrect address your etiquette questions in , Ink on White writing paper to miss manners , Box 91420, Cleveland Ohio 44101-3428. The Quill shortage prevents miss Man ners from answering questions except through this column. To Erma b0m8eck confessions have never been easy for Cath a Olics. A we form a line facing the altar with our backs to the confessional. Slowly we Inch backward to the Booth. The cubicle is Small and dark inside As we assume our position on the Kneier and ask absolution for our sins from the Shadow on the other Side of the screen. We worry. We worry that the priest will recognize our voice we worry that our confession will take so Long people in line will speculate we re terrorists. We worry what the priest will say when we admit our last confession was when Truman was president we worry that our sins will prompt the priest to raise his voice and say Quot that a disgusting a a Guy with a great sense of humor is trying to change All this. He figures if you can Send faxes to god for favors and place them in the wailing Wall in Jerusalem the world is ready for a Greg Garvey a automatic confession  this is the Way it would work. After you say a bless me father for i have sinned a a menu appears on the computer screen. You tap in the number of Days since your last confession and the num her of venial and mortal sins. A once the sin tally is recorded the machine Valeu lates your penance on a printout. Greg Garvey May be opening a High tech Pandora a Box. I foresee a wedding where the Bride presses 1 if she needs a Groom 2 if she needs witnesses 3 if she wants a caterer and 4 if she requests music. If she needs counselling to feel Good about herded Sion she should stay on the line. As for the confessional Garvey did say his plan cannot possibly replace a priest because the software has not been ordained. Not yet. A Universal press Syndicate no kidding what personal products were first called 1. Noxzema or. Buntings sunburn remedy. 2. Toilet paper a Gayetty a medicated paper 3. Ivory soap a White soap 4. Botex a cell Nap 5. Toni Home permanent a Roi was 6. Kleenex tissues a kleenex kerchiefs 7. Vick s vap rub a Vicki a croup and pneumonia Salve elements of Surprise 1. Horatio Nelson a never overcame seasickness 2. Pope John Xxiii fought in world War i 3. Marx and Engels a wrote 500 articles for the new York Tribune 4. St. Francis of Assisi a once wealthy Playboy. 5. Clarence Darrow a Law school dropout 6. Writer of Dixie a it a northerner composed in new York hotel Union troops first Sang the song a a. World features Syndicate. A Page 10 sunday May 22, 1994