European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - September 19, 1977, Darmstadt, Hesse                                , Ai i $ & a 1- denver76 Miles it Btu 77 up Ibernice Harbert 78, first lady of an Oasis in the Colorado Plains. Last Chance. By Richard h. Growald United press International he photograph on the front of the last Chance colo., postcard shows the truth. The backside is wrong. The postcard Man made it up said Larry Griese 19, grandson of a founder of last Chance. On the Back of the 10-cent card is printed in Early Pioneer Days legend tells us that this Small settlement was destroyed by Prairie fires and or indians on three different occasions. After rebuilding the third time the settlers remarked this is the last Chance this place has thus the name last Chance which is still a Welcome Oasis on the Colo Rado  Griese standing behind the Cash Register of the red Spur restaurant Chicken Fried Steak dinner $3, Chil Burger Platter $2 erased any notions of indians on the Warpath or settlers in covered wagons. Last Chance was founded in 1926," he said. He pointed at the postcard on the rack. The front photograph is a View from the East. It shows a wide Road which is . Highway 36, flanked by the red Spur two service stations a few Trees and a fewer houses. The truth is not much on the postcard he says. Go see the first lady. Mrs. Bernice Harbert is 78. She sat in the front room of her White plaster House watching a snowy 19-Inch screen showing a re run of All in the  she was trying to keep Busy. We re big now. We be got a population of 40,"Harbert said and smiled. She turned the television set sound off but kept the picture on. She likes to keep Busy. In 1926 this was a Crossroads where Highway 36 going East and West met Highway 71 going North an South. Not paved. Dirt roads. Trails really my husband or. Essa Harbert and or. Archi Chapman god rest their souls figured this would be a Good place to open a Gas station and store. It s 37 Miles North to Brush it s 38 Miles West to Strasburg and 37 Miles South to Limon and you had All that Way to go to get to a service station. So they put up a sign that this was the last Chance you had to get Gas and water for All that distance. That s How last Chance got its name. Never did see an Indian. In the 1920s we d have a lot of tourists coming through in Fords and chevies. Once in a while just once in a while mind you we d have a Buick she smiled and looked at the television screen. Carroll o Connor s face showed his Mouth opening and closing with no sound. It was a big moment when a Packard came  mrs. Harbert tried to recall big moments. Well there was the time the Mcguire Sis ters were Here. And we had a big famous Politi Cian come eat a couple of times at the red Spur. Big Man in the state. Famous. Can t think of his name  outside it was 100 degrees. Mechanics from the company farms on this last outer Steppe before the great Plains stumble into the Rocky mountains sat overflowing the chairs and called for More Home made Cherry pie for their tables in the red Spur. A family from a camper with Kansas License plate bought three postcards. In her House Harbert had no need for air conditioning. Or. Harbert and or. Chapman planted the Trees in 1926. Not even a Bush Here  the 1930s were bad of course the  county sent out Rice sugar and flour and some of the families around Here took it because the needed it. Others took it because Well they maybe did t realy need it but they wanted  world War ii years were maybe the worst. Or. Harbert would drive into Denver for the meat rations and come Back with maybe half a slab of Bacon and we had 12 families waiting at the store with their ration books. It s no fun to Divide up Hall a slab of Baco for 12 families when they re All your neighbors. And the government would Send out their Stool pigeons to poke around and pretend to be a Cus Tomer and see if we was managing the ration Book Stamps right and he would t fool us. I d Tell him i know who you Are and the Pigeon would apologize. But Well they paved the roads just before the War. Not All the Way to the Kansas line but they paved and widened. Man came in one Day and asked for a bottle of pop and i reached into the Chest and got one out and popped the top and told him it was a dime. They d gone up from a Nickel to a dime. He told me to put it Back. With the top already off. People Are nicer these  she smiled. The smile faded. In the War my younger son Wayne went into sub marines. He was in the submarine that got into that japanese Harbor and they dropped 12 depth charges on the submarine. Missed. Or. Harbert and i did t know anything about it until we read it in the Denver paper. Denver is 77 Miles  the state Highway sign outside said 76 Miles. Well it s 77 Miles. The state Don t live Here.  Wayne returned after the War and ran the store. He got tired of people and went up in the mountains and ranches. Charles who was in the air Force ran the garage. Or. Harbert died 14 years ago. Wayne sup in the mountains. Charles died March 12." she touched her eyes. Or. Harbert and i came out of Putnam county Missouri and our parents homesteaded Here. About 1911. Then the last Chance store. Or. Chapman s daughter and her husband , run that now. I m Here with the House and the Trees. Been her since 1926 at the Crossroads. Lots of folks been killed in car accidents there. Did t read the signs. Yes the founders were or. Harbert and or. Chapman and now there s just me. I go Over to the red Spur and Wash dishes monday wednesday and saturday. Set up tables too. Don t need the Money of course. But i be got to keep Busy. It s my last  to Zap by Richard h. Growald United press International a North Dakota pop. 271, re members May 10, 1969, As san Francisco recalls its earthquake and fire. The bad Day at Zap was planned by College students. Their slogan was zip to  it was our Black Friday said r. B. Chip Unruh Par time Zap auditor and full time agent telegraphed at the White and Green train depot off main Street. The Riff Raff came Early and stayed late. So did the Beer Unruh said. There must have been 2,500 to 3,000 that  the students were All right. But the Riff Raff Well they ripped off flooring and made a Bonfire in main Street. They climbed onto the roofs of houses and hurled Down unopened Beer cans. The town peace officer called in the Mercer county deputies. It was t enough. It looked bad. But we had Luck. The nation Al guard was bivouacked nearby. The guard came in with bayonets in the morning and routed out the zippers to Zap Unruh said. He lit his pipe. On the Wall Hung a 1966 Calendar. Except for the year that Calendar is a ditto of 1977. So Why not use it i hear Tell that if you got 14 different yearly calendars you got All you need for eternity every year will fit one of  the year of zip to Zap was not showing. Nor was 1941. It was in the Winter of 1941 42 that the Zap wildcats won 19 straight High school basketball games. We won District. But then in game postmaster Fuchs will Zap make a killing with Coal up number 20, Gladstone beat us knocking us out of the state championships. And you know Gladstone was even a smaller town than  Zap emerged on the map on the Hilly Plains East of the North Dakota badlands in 1913. It was built be tween Beulah and Golden Valley where the Railroad came to pick up Coal from the surface Lignite mines. As Coal goes so goes Zap. German american Farmers had settled the land. The Only printed history of Zap lists 28 men As donating land for the train depot 18 bore German names. Bitterman is a grand old name in Zap. A Bitterman built the first House on main Street. It was a Bitterman who Laid Down most of Zap s sidewalks. It was a bit Terman who served for decades As town marshal. Not All was Ideal for bitter ans. Outstanding Pioneer woman was grandma Bitterman recorded the pro Gram for the 1959 old settlers picnic and Lignite Jamboree free doughnuts tug of War in main Street Parade carnival the Tony Weber orchestra at the Zap dance Hall and 9 30 . Fireworks. Not Only did she paint Wash clothes and clean House for the helpless but she also helped Over 40 babies to survive. De spite the number of Good deeds she did for others no medical help could be obtained for her when she needed it in her last  the Snow plows get the doctors through now. According to postmaster Norman Fuchs Zap s population is split among Coal miners Farmers and re tired. At the head of main Street outside White Frame House retired Farmer Carl Morast 75, sits on a Lawn chair and smiles when asked How he keeps occupied. The Only thing i do is  he also considers the 800 acres on which he used to grow wheat and Barley. He had 11 children. Two died in infancy. Eight others grew up and fled farming As far As saudi Arabia. One son Farmed but he was killed in a car crash in March. So i just keep the  an acre of Farmland Sells near Zap for about $1,000. Carl Morast smiles. If 1 sell the govern ment gets 90 per cent. I keep the  Zap is a Fine place to sit and retire Carl Morast said. He can speak German with his neighbors the grocery Sells the makings for German dishes. Zap is so Small town cozy that no Zap resident has fallen victim to a hand lettered sign in a store All checks that Are returned twice for not sufficient funds will be put on display in the  Sandie Navratil has installed a third chair in her Beauty parlor. Her Dachshund Hersey sniffs at the Asphalt being put Down to repave main Street. Adolf Schuh 64,walks his granddaughters Shelley 6 and Julie 2, to Zap s Riverside Park. Postmaster Fuchs sits in the Zap inn a bar he once owned. Yes during the Viet Nam War gis made Zap Small z a Slang word for  it in t our fault if Zap someone gets zapped. This town was named for a Scot Tish mining Hamlet. It has nothing to do with  he pointed to the Hills. On one High school students Laid out White washed rocks to form a giant z. It dominates the View from Highway 200. The Hills Are Green in summer and Black with Coal be Neath. A the Energy crisis. The great Days of Zap lie ahead. Want Coal then zip to  Fuchs smiled.  51 St state by Jules Loh associated press Merica s 51st state proves to be on inspection As True to its High purpose As the y it was founded and this sign was raised at its Border entering nay aug capital of Glastonbury. Bypassed by Progress and blessed by the  and Down below please walk your horses. Adults at  anyone unaware that America had a 51st state nay aug will be relieved that it is As mayor Jim Finne explains a state of mind. Anyone unaware that America needed a new state of mind has t been paying attention to what s unimportant. Of nay aug is a place All right a Rural Square mile in Connecticut somewhere South of Hartford bounded by the Connecticut River and roaring Brook where hypocrisy is unknown and the Meek have inherited the Earth. We just think life is terribly grim Jim Flynne said. Everybody seems to be running around with gavels and clipboards and causes and taking themselves so seriously. Well we Don  to put it mildly. What Naya Gians do instead is skewer the pompous with satire and laugh All the while. Thus they elected Chet Hodge Village Butcher As Man of the year held a Parade and also a House tour around chefs Birthplace at which nay aug social director Ruth Witherspoon pointed out such historic Sites As the drainpipe Chet Slid Down the tree Chet climbed the window of the room where Chet was potty  overcome Chet wept. Thus they elected Village grocer Elmer Gardiner As governor of nay aug and when he announced for president from atop a Hay Wagon at a Pancake breakfast they fired a 2.1 gun Salute in his Honor two muskets and a pistol. Thus they dedicated a Section of mayor Finne s pasture As a Village Green and after a few appropriate words from the nay aug historian . Mangan and from the nay aug venerable latin scholar John Finney and a few lines from the nay aug poet laureate and militant feminist Hilda Moe and kisses All around from the nay aug first lady septuagenarian Ruth Dufford and advice on the danger of sitting on cold stones from the beloved proctologist Archibald Ascot brooch and a tune or two on the piano by the nay aug musical director arid ambassador to the Vatican Joe Puzzo the assembled Naya Gians erected a sign on this spot 357 years ago nothing Hap  Naya Gians go for signs. One sign encourages Ball playing on the Green. Another placed by the nay aug conservationist or was it the cat control commissioner warns native Rattlesnake crossing. Even before All this tomfoolery began about 15 years ago the neighbourhood thereabouts was known As nay aug the Southen Section of the City of Glaston Bury. The name is a Indian word for roaring Brook. We have that on authority of the nay aug archivist. The tribe was described As a peace Loving people often harassed by More warlike neighbors mayor Finne said. We find that  sufficiently harassed though peace Loving Naya Gians will fight Back. Like the time the City tried to pave nay aug s last remaining dirt Lane dug Road. The town manager Don peach wanted it paved Finne said. The voice was shrill behind the Grin. That sort of Progress we can do without. So with proper ceremony we changed its name. We changed it from dug Road to Donald c. Peach Boulevard. Now i ask you would a Public servant dare improve his own memorial Donald c. Peach blvd. Remains a progressively unpaved. It s Good fun something neighbors can catch the spirit of said social director Witherspoon. If it helps us keep our perspective so much the better. We plan All our unorganized activities of course at irregular meetings of the nay aug great books  one such activity was an assault on the Connecticut legislature to petition nay aug s neigh Boring state to join in pardoning lord Cornwallis. It s a complicated Story something to do with Cornwallis having had an amour with a nay aug Maiden and therefore could t have been All bad and besides Ford had pardoned Nixon and further More gov. Gardiner had made a Campaign prom ise. Then there was the great whale watch. That recent gathering came about after John Finney on a Moonlight stroll with his wife Dotty along the Riverbank spotted what was he said unmistakably a new zealand right Piggy whale. Naya Gians calculated that if they would but As semble at the exact spot beneath the next full Moon they could summon from the Depths the same Crea Ture by firing a Cannon and blowing a trombone. They pointed the Cannon toward the tax collector s off ice. The whale appeared. Don t ask How. 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