European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - January 26, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Cover Stor Rypien Kelly what happened to Tarkenton by Dan Rodricks the Baltimore evening Sun i m having a male problem. Can we talk its football. I think in be burned my fuse. I feel like maybe i should see a neurologist about this maybe get a cat scan. You see As hard As it is to admit i think in be lost my ability to retain information about the National football league. My old auntie Grazier who has a Bookie named skip now knows More about the nil than i do a and she a 80 every time i watch a game and hear a new name the information does not reach my brain. It goes poof. And i hate when that happens. It finally hit me during the nil playoffs. The Only players i knew were John Elway and Warren Moon. I was glad to see them. From what i remember of their game Elway played for the Broncos who Are still in Denver and the Broncos won. They Defeated give me a minute they Defeated the Houston oilers right. The Houston oilers. The team Moon plays for. Done to even ask me about tonight a redskins Bills super bowl. I  know Rypien and Kelly if they walked into my office. So you see i have football old timers disease. The thing is i used to be an extremely intense fan Able to name most players of most teams. Really there was such a time in my life but i just realized the other Day a that was 25 years ago Johnson was president and Tarkenton was still a quarterback. So were Unitas and Jurgensen. I could name the entire offensive line of the Kansas City chiefs the Baltimore Colts and the Green Bay packers. I knew the top passer the top receiver the top running Back. In fact i knew the mediocre Guys. I knew the kickers and could even spell their names a Jan and Garo my head was full of the stuff. I might have failed seventh Grade algebra but i knew the Oakland raiders. When they needed a Yard for a first Down Lamonica handed off to a Guy named Dixon. Dixon was one of those big mean running backs. Jim Nance Hoyle Granger Jim Taylor Jim Brown were among the others. My football mind stood still in the Era of Gale Sayers Joe Namath and Larry Csonka. Somewhere m the mid to Lale l�?~f7 a i started losing my football mind. 1 tried to get it Back in the �?T80s, but failed terribly. So terribly that recently when someone a fran Tarkenton and the Minnesota Vikings collapse under Otis Sistrunk and the Oakland raiders in the 1977 super bowl. Said Thurman Thomas was currently the greatest running Back in the nil i responded with two questions 1. Who a Thurman Thomas 2. Whatever happened to Thurman Munson so you Sec where i am. I am lost in the morass that is the National football league. There Are too Many teams too Many players too Many games in a season that is too Long. I grew up in a much simpler time. It seemed like there was Only one game on to each week a the giants is. The Browns. A Little while later the american football league started getting More time on to and the jets played the dolphins and the raiders played the chiefs. Curt Gowdy did the play by play then went Hunting for Caribou on another Channel. It was much easier to know football Back then. I was younger. The brain cells sizzled. Now in a losing it. And a a it being a very male thing you can imagine the Impact this is having on my psyche. Really its very hard to admit a you know Guy to Guy. Why a cause in the Yoo knotted states of a Merka a Guys Sposta know his loot bawl. But the truth is there Are millions of Guys like me. They wont admit it but they be either lost interest in the nil or succumbed to real life or both. Flo Joe Namath after leading the new York jets to their super bowl stunner of 1969. Lbs John Madden coached the raiders to the �?T77 bowl title and will Analyse today a game for lbs. They re Between 30 and 50 years old and they still think Roger staubach is the Dallas quarterback. Perhaps i exaggerate. But Quick Tell me who is the Dallas quarterback in a betting that nine out of 10 Guys picked at random on any Street Corner or office elevator wont be Able to Tell you who the quarterback for Dallas is. There Are Only three groups of american Guys w to really know what a going on. 1. Boys Between the Ages of 8 and 15. 2. Sportswriters bookies gamblers and members of the Cato Institute. 3. John Madden who despite appearances is really a group of  6 a sunday january 26 1992