European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - July 21, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse _ Page 2job offered must Type file handle bombs Patrick Mckenna guest columnist in a doomed. In a in the air Force which in itself Isnit dangerous unless your Job has anything to do with air mine does no to. Unfortunately in be just been trained to be an explosive ordnance disposal augmented. What this Means is during War id leave my comfortable Dei Job in Public affairs to be blown up. In a trying to Cope with this fact we All have to go sometime. Done to we i just never imagined id be Riding out on a fireball. What i done to understand is when we had to Clear All the bombs off the runway. Sgt. Robert Davis our Eod instructor told us not to worry about getting a a Blower up since a explosives Arentt dangerous and a Geod work is just As Safe As working in an i guess with the right kind of fiendish guidance an ism selectric Iii typewriter could be transformed into a deadly icbms anti Secretary device a an unconventional weapon capable of razing a medium size Steno Pool. I prefer taking my chances accidentally tripping off an unstable rubber band or setting off a Box of unpredictable paper clips than fiddling around with a a perfectly Safe jillion megaton nuclear missile. If they re so Safe Why drop them on our enemies we be using the unsafe stuff we be using the stuff capable of blasting them into next week like office machines. Well the enemy Isnit As Clever As that yet. They re still using unsophisticated and obsolete radar guided heat seeking photo and move ment sensitive voice activated infrared missiles. During a War one of those dinosaurs might actually find its Way by Luck right Here at Raf Bent Waters England. That a when ill Spring into action a if the bomb does no to go off. What in a suppose to do once in be sprung is kind of a Gray area since we had the readers digest version of a bomb disposal 101.�?� the full time Eod technicians go to school for about nine months. We had less than a week. What i did manage to pick up were these three important lessons a if you observe your full time Eod counterpart jumping into a ditch insert fingers into your ears. A you never hear the one that gets you. A make sure you always Wear clean underwear. Our class was the first taught at Ben Waters. Because of this Davis said a there will be a lot of hitting and lets Hope this Cavalier attitude does no to apply to the first live bomb we have to defuse. Davis reassured us by telling the class of the Many safety precautions taken before a going Down on a this is the quaint term Eod people use to Call the actual a hands on defusing of a bomb a like macgyver does every week when he saves the world from nuclear destruction. According to Davis the last thing a bomb disposal person wants to do is a macgyver. A we ainu to dumb we done to want to die a Davis said. He then explained that mortar rounds were nothing More than a overgrown i know i question him since he is a for a amps Roel Wielinga seasoned Veteran and All which in Eod Means he still has All of his fingers. I still have my doubts. In a especially concerned about the reliability of the equipment we re using to a make Safe unexploded ordnance. One of the methods involves shooting half a cup of water into the bomb to defuse it. I can imagine How this might frighten our enemies. A ooh no look look. Its the water in in a sorry but ill stick to a Long fuse and a typewriter. Patrick Mckenna is an air Force sergeant with the 81 St tac fighter Wing Public affairs office at Raf Ben Waters in your column plus a photo of yourself to be our guest sunday Magazine the stars and stripes Apo 09211 or Postrach 11 14 37, d-6100 Darmstadt 11, Universal City studios inc. Richard Dreyfuss and Danny Aiello Are two of the stars in once around. Page 16. From the cover.4-6 a pains colourful bullfights. David Tarrant writes and Jim Derheim shoots. Andy Rooney .7 Don t say goodbye Columbus. Books and language. 8-9 its Quot gone with the wind ii. Odds amp ends .10 Cindy Chambers on food cheaters. To plus.11 Quot Gasthaus a big draw on an to. Television listings.12-14 local Cable and satellite schedules. On the tube .15 to helps catch Crooks. Home entertainment .16 Rushing to Laud a the Russia House. A a Joe Bob Briggs .17 Quot do or die a live one. This weeks films .18-19 Chuck Vinch Quot Robin Hood on target. Complete cafes circuit listings. Classified ads .20-23 last laugh .24 Dave Barry cartoons. Sunday is a weekly supplement of the stars and stripes editor Buck Fox Art direction Wes Booher production Kelly Quinn Lisa Williams editorial assistance Marian Hamilton Louis Pierce a sunday july 21. 1991
