European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - December 22, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Fish a  Utai i m a u Utaji  a a Quot a a a a a a a it a 1  a it a a ����--�?����?nr�?ttt1 tabloid readers wont be shocked by Madonna Bio by Jocelyn Eccl Iorg the Hartford Cowant Simon amp schuster which made a mint earlier this year from Kitty Kelley a epic trashing of the former first lady is Back in the unauthorized Bio Biz sicking Christopher Andersen on Madonna. When it comes to spewing venom Andersen Young Kate citizen june is a Mere Pup in training to Kelley a cerberus. Kelley pricked Nancy Reagan s Prim balloon. Nancy and Frank Sinatra trusting the afternoon away horrors what would Shock us about Madonna she makes her own pie crust she likes Small dogs and children she a a Virgin Andersen tries mightily in Madonna unauthorised. A friends Quot claim that Madonna cruises the streets of Manhattan picking up Young latino men and having her Way with them in the Back seat of her Limo much As Nancy r. Allegedly did with Frank s. In the Blue room. Andersen says Madonna is bisexual although he never names names. As a teen Ager. Madonna went to Church wearing nothing under her overcoat. She once showed up at a Manhattan sex club with several boys on a Leash. She has had multiple abortions. She has had her lips injected with Collagen. Her cup size is a c. Her 10 is Over 140. What to believe w hat to believe writing a Quot biography Quot of an overexposed pop icon who wont give you the time of Day is no great Challenge in our celebrity saturated Era. Andersen a gossipy life of Jane Fonda was unsanctioned by its subject too but filling up 334 hardcover pages on the life of a 33-year-old, no matter How famous leaves us munching on these sorts of morsels Madonna was a Brownie until she switched to Camp fire girls because their uniforms were Quot cooler a Madonna a first name is not italian but French Canadian in origin. Much More entertaining Are the Sean Penn years. The antics of Madonna and her no. I boy toy earned them such nicknames among the press ass amp a and the Poison Penns. Andersen claims that Penn had this to say on his wedding Day after he fired a semiautomatic pistol at the press helicopters hovering above a a a i d love to see one of those helicopters Burn a he told his stunned Bride to be and the bodies inside  a a later Sean would use a picture of Madonna smug for target practice. Regular readers of the tabloids will learn nothing they did t already know about the Day Sean trussed Madonna like a Turkey and you May have heard this one too did you know that after the oscars Madonna and Michael Jackson retired to her place took off their clothes inspected each others bodies a with the curiosity of two beings from different planets Quot and then still nude munched on Popcorn and watched old movies on the Var yeah and 1 bet a Kernel landed in her Navel an a Ginny Quot. Madonna is mean mean mean. She does t like children. Small dogs 1 done to know. Maybe that s in the other current Madonna Bio i  bring myself to read the paperback Madonna revealed by Douglas Thompson. And reportedly even More would be biographers Are on the Loose chasing Down Madonna rumours she once told two Little girls who wanted autographs Quot you re nothing. You done to mean anything to  did Madonna and Michael Jackson really watch old movies in the nude who knows maybe this unpleasant incident really happened. Madonna May have been a Brownie but she was no girl scout. In an epilogue a the Only part of the Book that attempts to Analyse Madonna a Appeal and Success and gaze farther than her scars belly Button a Andersen suggests that a time May be running out for Madonna unless she can admit to herself that Quot what she docs onstage in her 3 s might seem grotesquely inappropriate for a woman in her 50s.&Quot by the time Madonna and i arc in our 50s, i Hope Lime will have run out for these shallow dredging exercises that leave a film of dirt on everybody. Stop me before i read one again the stars and stripes Book department says Madonna unauthorized is available in its  there a Market for hostage books by Rick Hampson the associated press asked to explain his ordeal As a hostage in Lebanon Terry Anderson said a it would take a Hook. There s an idea a it s a pretty Good one according to booksellers and publishers who say readers would be interested in a Good Book by americans once held in Lebanon. Quot it Terry Anderson or one of the other hostages showed up to sign their books we d have a line out the door Quot said Lillian Yeilding of Oxford books w hich has four stores in Georgia. Three american former hostages a David Jacobsen the Rev. Benjamin Weir and television correspondent Charles Glass a w Rote books dealing at least in part with their Captivity. With the release of the Iasi american hostages others Are expected to Start writing. Some observers question the Market for such books. They note that books by hostages held in Iran did not sell Well. A there s been an orgy of news Media coverage and most readers feel its not Worth the Money for a Book Quot said David Schwartz of the Harry w. Schwartz bookshops in Milwaukee. A the publishing Industry thought military books would take off after the Gulf War and they  Quot the hostages have been in the news for six years now a enough already Quot said Warren Cassell of just books in Greenw Ich Conn. There is general agreement however that there s room for a Good Book. Quot i done to look Forward to an instant hostages Book but we need a substantial Book by someone who was there and can write a said Susan Davis of the chapter two Bookstore in Charleston . Quot id be leery of Hooks trying to exploit their notoriety right this minute Quot said Morgan Entrkin of the Atlantic monthly press. Jacobsen Shook. Hostage my Nightmare in Beirut was published in August and is in its second printing. Although Davis in Charleston and Schwartz in Milwaukee said they had failed to sell any copies the publisher says it is Selling Well despite the author s reluctance to plug it in interviews. Weir s Book / of face bound. Hostage free. Was published Avi years ago by Westminster press which is affiliated with the presbyterian Church. The Book has a religious flavor with Long passages on weirs Faith and Reliance on the Bible Glass tribes with flags a dangerous passage through the chaos of the Middle East was published in 1990. Entrekin noted that Glass account of his capture and escape is Only part of the Book. It sold More than 10,000 copies in hardcover and 15,000 More in paperback. Andersons sister Peggy say published a Book last year forgotten exc Cruls of which appeared in Newsweek. Sis Levin wife of former hostage Jeremy Levin wrote Beirut Dairy about their experiences. Published in 1989, it sold 35,000 hardcover copies and was made into a to movie. Frank Reed held in Lebanon from 1986 to 1990, said last year that eight publishers were bidding for rights to a Book he was writing. Hostages who would be writers have a problem according to Jeff Rog it vice president of merchandising for Walden books. A a you re a year away from publishing a thoughtful Book and by that time the attention of the curious Reader is gone. So the question becomes has this person written a real Book a a a if so he said a publisher a probably would be willing to make a seven figure  8 a sunday december 22. 1991