European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - November 22, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Cranking out hot inventions in the Home Dave Barry today s scary topic for parents is what your children do when you re not Home. I have a letter from Buffalo n.y., working mom Judy Price concerning her 14-year-Otd son David Quot who should certainly know Hetter because the school keeps telling me he is a Genius hut i have not seen signs of this in our Normal everyday life a Judy states hat one Day when she came Home from work David met her outside and said Quot i mom. Are you going in a this is a bad sign parents Judy says she considered replying Quot no i thought id just stay Here in the car All night and pull away for work in the  that actually would have been a Wise idea. Instead she went inside where she found a Large Black Circle burned into the Middle of her Kitchen counter. Quot David Quot she screamed Quot what were you cooking a the soft timid reply came Back Quot a  Quot a baseball Quot Judy writes. Quot of course. What else could it be How could i forget to Tell my children never to Cook a baseball its my fault  it turns out that according to David a Best friends Cousin a and if you can to believe him who can you believe a you can hit a baseball three times As far if you really heat it up first. So David did this and naturally he Pul the red hot pan Down directly onto the counter top probably because there was no rare antique furniture available. For the record David claims that the healed baseball did in fact go farther. But this docs not mean you Young readers should try this foolish and dangerous Experiment at Home. Use a friends Home. No seriously you Young people should never heat a baseball without proper adult supervision just As you should never a and 1 say this from personal experience a attempt to make a Rumba Box. A Rumba Box is an obscure musical instrument that consists of a wooden Box with Metal strips attached to it in such a Way that when you plunk them the Box resonates with a pleasant rhythmic sound. The Only time i Ever saw a Rumba Box was in 1964, when a Friend of my parents named Walter Karl played one at a gathering at our House and it sounded great. Or. Karl explained that the Metal strips were actually pieces of the Spring from an old fashioned wind up phonograph. This gave my Best Friend Lanny Watts an idea. Lanny was always having ideas. For example one Day he got tired of walking to the end of his driveway to get the mail so he Hung the Mailbox from a rope and Pulley system Strung up the driveway to his porch where he hooked it up to a washing machine motor. When the mailman came Lanny simply plugged in the motor and whoosh the Mailbox fell Down. The amount of time Lanny spent unsuccessfully trying to get this labor saving device to work was equivalent to approximately 5,000 trips to get the actual mail but that is the  of convenience. So anyway when Lanny heard or. Karl explain the Rumba Box he realized two things 1. His parents had an old fashioned wind up phonograph they hardly Ever used. 2. They both worked out of the Home. So Lanny and i decided to make our own Rumba Box. Our plan As i recall was to take the phonograph apart snip off a bit of the Spring then put the phonograph Back together and nobody would be the Wiser. This plan worked perfectly until we removed the Metal Box that held the phonograph Spring this Box turned out to be very hard to open. Quot Why would they make it so Strong Quot we asked ourselves. Finally recalling the lessons we had Learned about mechanical advantage in High school physics class we decided to hit the Box with a Sledge Hammer. It turns out that the reason the Box is so Strong is that there is a really powerful lightly wound extremely irritable Spring in there and when you let it out it just goes berserk writhing and snarling and thrashing violently All Over the room seeking to gain revenge on All the people who have cranked it Over the years. Lanny and i fled the room until the Spring calmed Down. When we returned we found phonograph parts spread All Over the room mixed in with 2,4 Miles of Spring. We realized wed have to modify our project goal slightly from making a Rumba Box to being in an entirely new continent when Lanny a mom got Home. Actually mrs. Watts went fairly easy on us just As Judy Price seems to have been Good Humoured about her songs heating the baseball. Moms Are usually pretty Good that Way. But sometimes i wonder. You know How Guys arc always complaining that they used to have a base Ball card collection that would be Worth a Fortune today if they still had it but their moms threw it out and the Guys always say a mom just did no to know any  Well i wonder if the moms knew exactly what they were doing. Getting even. The Miami Herald  military life in Europe by Charles Kaufman in two Short you m t m those a  Caer hot that have sheep la it 5o  ?5 Avo he. Her via j of two Alwais t a to or Otap -7h�ap of Yew i Nev Yov be in 3 us. Sunday november 22. 1992