European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - July 17, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Miss manners Judith Martin dear miss manners i am a High school senior English teacher and near the end of this school year one of my students with whom have always enjoyed a close relationship asked me to sign her yearbook. Naturally i agreed enthusiastically but the timing of her request was mutually inconvenient so we agreed that i would sign on another specific occasion. When that occasion arrived she had forgotten to bring her yearbook. Since then i have heard nothing More about it although i have seen this student a number of limes. She has even been to my House along with other students. My feelings arc rather Hurt and in a not sure what if anything i should do. Graduation was Over a a month ago and if this student were to ask me to sign her yearbook now pm afraid i would feel too taken for granted to oblige. Gentle Reader wait a minutes you re the teacher Here not the teenager and you be been sulking for a month because you weren to sufficiently begged to have the Honor of signing a High school yearbook miss manners feels like crying. But she wont because then there would be nobody left in the society willing to behave like a grown up. Yearbook signing is an absorbing activity while it. Lasts but it does no to last after the closing of school. And by August anybody who takes a yearbook off the shelf can count on being puzzled by what people meant by a remember the time that it or Why a keep in touch Quot appears so often Over the Signa turns of people who did t keep in close touch when they saw one another in class every Day. If yoi.1 see that student a gain you might suggest to her that she could bring  yearbook. But Only if you solemnly Promise miss manners not to Brood if she forgets to do so. It is time to grow up. Dear miss manners i was rebuked and embarrassed at a Conner Outing with my parents and some friends of heirs when i was told that one is supposed to tuck in the envelope Flap of a letter rather than Seal it when giving a card to a Friend. I licked Only the tip to Seal it As the card had to travel Home with my father that evening and then to Europe with him a week later. Everyone seemed up in arms about it and my. Mother told me it was rude. If this is such a breach of etiquette i wonder Why she did no to teach me earlier. Gentle Reader maybe she already taught you everything else a except that one should not Embarrass ones children in front of others which she apparently does no to know. It is True that one does not Seal the envelope of a letter that one has asked someone else to deliver. The idea seems to be that you Are so certain that the Carrier is honorable and therefore would not Peck into the letter that you did no to bother. But this is such a Fine Point that miss manners would like to Point out to your Mother How Lucky she is that your behaviour is such that she can consider this a major breach. Dear miss manners my sister in Law who is a widow became furious when i addressed cards to her using mrs. And her first name. She said people who did that were ignorant and should read an etiquette Book. What do you think gentle Reader that she ought to read More widely in the one she has. Her Book is Correct that a lady a name docs not change when her husband Dies. But miss manners suggests that she spend More time Reading the Section on How rude it is to lash out at people who inadvertently make mistakes. Dear miss manners Over half of the wedding Shower gifts we received were gifts of Money. How does one go about writing a thank you card to someone for such a gift without sounding crude there was also a a Brown bag Shower consisting of gifts of Brown bags of groceries. It was a pleasant and unique Shower that we thoroughly enjoyed but How do i go about thanking someone for such a considerate gift gentle Reader however useful and Welcome Money May be it is miss manners would like to Point out a crude present. For one thing the recipient knows exactly what it Cost the most Graceful Way to disguise this in your thanks is to select a real present on that persons behalf a that is to Tell the donor what you have. Bought with the Money. The rest of the thanks can Ihnn apply to he present As if the giver had selected it. / a a \ Quot. A a a a. By comparison the grocery letter is easy a you have something tangible to write about after All. Something along the lines of a so delightful of you to Stock our new pantry with such wonderful and delicious things should do  a a a a. United feature Syndicate. A fooling incorrect address your etiquette questions in Black or Blue Black Ink on White writing paper to miss manners . Box 91428, Cleveland Ohio 44101-3428. The Quill shortage prevents miss manners from answering questions except through this column. Downes Usa a fall he thinks about is that stupid  bite into children a tooth approach Erma Bumbeck a Young Reader Rachel Richard of san. Antonio wonders Why i have not written anything about children a Teeth i have said it before Rachel and i will say it again in Case you missed it. In their lifetime my children will never be Able to repay me for All the sacrifices i made in behalf of their dazzling smiles. Without my constant dedication to Hygiene hourly dental appointments and an orthodontist for whom my payments bought a Condo in Hilton head they would never have gone to a prom. Fora period of seven or eight years parents think of nothing else but their kids Teeth. It All begins one Day when a child wiggles one of those adorable Little baby Teeth and announces a a it a  this is when parents should go to the Bank open an account under a a Teeth and stash away every Penny they can get. According to Rachel her tooth was a  every baby tooth is a Dangler because it hangs there by a thread and no one has the. Guts to pull it. It Falls into the mashed potatoes one night and the pressure is off. The tooth is placed under a Pillow and the tooth fairy either coughs up some Loose change or writes a Check. No one knows How All this got started or How to Stop it. When the second set of Teeth Start to emerge count on their being crooked. A decision must be made. Do you want a child  Teeth in places. Where no Teeth have gone before or do you want him or her to have the smile you could never afford for yourself. A 1 a a the Road to perfect Teeth leads straight to an orthodontists office where your child eventually will. Be outfitted with a retainer instructions on How to clean it and a Little Blue leather bag to store it in to prevent it from getting a lot of germs. The second Day out you will find the retainer on the Back of the commode in the Freezer with a piece of gun stuck in it in the Hope it will be easier to loosening a Backpack or used As a bookmark. The dog often plays catch with it. Rachel is in the retainer stage now and is annoyed that it hurts. Trust me Rachel your Mother Only wants you to be Happy. A a a Universal press Syndicate. A no kidd1no? recommended routine for housewives 1869 monday a prepare for the week tuesday a Wash. Wednesday a Iron thursday a Iron mend fold put away clothes Friday a sweep and clean House saturday a put things in order sunday a religious duties. The american woman s Home manual a when they made their first million 1. Shirley Temple a before age 10 2. Fabian a at age 18 3. John Paul Getty a at age 244. Aristotle Onassis a at age 255. Voltaire a at age 40. World features syn Vicale Page 10 sunday july 17.1994