European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - February 14, 1993, Darmstadt, Hesse Missman Krs Judith Martin dear Mies manner my Mother s Cousin a woman i Sec Only every few years gave us Beautiful Crystal cordial glasses for our wedding Over a year ago and i promptly wrote her a note thanking Herand telling her How much we enjoy using them. Recently i was browsing in a department store an realized that the cordial glasses Are actually can should i do should i write a follow up note acknowledging my Blunder i feel More than a Little silly about the whole thing. Gentle readers miss manners does not normally suggest that a bridal couple write a second round of thank you notes. She is too exhausted from nag Ging less Well mannered people than yourself to do the first , it is really not necessary to Correct your mis take. By your charming letter and because everyone believes brides to be etiquette Freak you undoubtedly convinced your Cousin that they were cordial glasses and that either she or the store that Dis played them with candles in them was in error. So there is Only a problem if in spite of miss Man ners reassurance you continue to feel silly. In that Case you could write a letter with the delightful news that you not Only continue to enjoy the cordial glasses but also you have found that they work justas Well As candlesticks. Dear miss manners travel attire is not what it used to be. In the interest of Comfort on overseas flights where one May be sleeping in one s clothes Are jogging suits acceptable Are they worn fro door to door or just on the plane if put on at 38,000 feet what keeps the original outfit acceptable after being stuffed in a carry on for eight hours gentle Reader you will think that horrid old reality has worn miss manners Down when she fails to respond with the indignation you probably anticipate about the decline in dress standards on Over night docs remember the Nice sense of adventure that was conveyed when travellers looked spiffy at least when boarding the air plane. The less said about How Well dressed people looked when they arrived the better. And she still deplores such excesses of Comfort As shorts and undershirts. But the overriding Rule of etiquette on overnight flights is Don t tic up the bathroom. The practice of changing clothes on an air plane would involve too much human suffering and miss manners does t today we re no ulv b chocolate Steinen Usa the terrible gourmet mean on the part of those changing. So she does not object to jogging suits As a publicly permissible version of pyjamas in which to spend the night on an air plane. The convention about being officially invisible when fetching the newspaper from one s front Doorstep in one s Bath Robe applies to overnight travellers until they reach their hotels. Dear Mitt manners my Uncle Bill is the _ chief family letter writer often offering along wit family news and copies of letters to and from others his sometimes vitriolic political does t state these As personal attacks but As observations and he Only does so in the letters he sends my Mother knowing she shares these letters with my brother my sister and me and our Chil Dren. He never includes them in the letters rewrites to the rest of us. These remarks about cheat ing welfare mothers idiotic democratic officials etc., really bother us. We love Uncle Bill and have never responded to his comments nor has our Mother. We simply leave politics out of our family letters. Does etiquette allow us a response that will main Tain family Harmony we appreciate Uncle Bill s efforts to stay in touch but wish he would Stop his at tacks on our beliefs and political Reader yes there is a response and you should All learn it Mother brother sister children and you. You just should t write it to Uncle response is that s Uncle Bill for said with a smiling shrug it Means we know he s impossible but we love this is an even better family lesson for the Chil Dren than the one you would love to teach Uncle Bill but would never succeed in miss manners my Boyfriend and i who have been living together for almost four years received a wedding invitation addressed to or. X and it seemed cold and impersonal and even stranger is the fact that my Boyfriend is not just a invitee he is to be the Best Man. The prospective Groom and Bride have known us the past three years. When my Boyfriend questioned the Bride she re plied that according to miss manners if two people arc unmarried and you Are unsure of the last name of one you simply address the invitation to a and i was deeply Hurt by this and would appreciate your clarification. Personally i would find out the last names of people i knew to be living together especially the Best Man s significant other. Gentle Reader you Are deeply Hurt what about miss manners you have Only been slighted she has been Only did miss manners never say any such thing. She has been taking the opposite position that one has an obligation to find out the full name of anyone to whom one is issuing an invitation. United feature Syndicate feeling incorrect addrow you etiquette questions to Blue 0� Blue Black Ink on Amto writing paper to Mist manner. . Box 91428, Cleveland Ohto 441014426. The Quill shortage prevent flu manner from a Werling Queton except through this column. 1993. Tano Onius Watrt Syndicate Harris Usa somehow i thought Cabot to would to lot a Clear View on the drag of Long hair Erm Bombeck want Long hair. I honestly do. But frankly Idon t have the time or the Energy to play within. I be watched Cindy Crawford and Christi Brinkley. Their hands Are perpetual motion grabbing pounds of hair and pushing it off their faces Only to have it fall in the same spot and limit their vision. These people can t carry a package eat hot dogs wave or shake hands. Every second of their lives is consumed with raking their fingers through their hair and getting their sight Back. I View love scenes on to where there is so much hair swishing around the Guy could be making love to King Kong and never know the difference. Years ago i remember doing a stint on the Dinah Shore show. One of the guests was Crystal Gayle who confided in me off camera that her ankle length hair which had never been Cut had fallen into the toilet in her dressing room. In today s vernacular that would translate to a bad hair my problem is i Don t have the patience to make Toast let alone wait an hour for my hair to dry. Of sure i occasionally throw my head Back As if i m having a seizure but it s not the same As barbra Streisand or Michelle Pfeiffer flipping their locks and having them take the dust off the door frames. Long hair exudes sex. It symbolizes the totally feminine woman who manicures her toenails dials the car phone with a Pencil and carries a Toothbrush with her at All times. It s a Man Plaser. That s Why it s always a Shock to see Gloria Stei Nerri wearing her hair like a Cape. Short hair was born of Defiance. Women flaunted their Independence by declaring they could look and dress the Way they wanted and if men did t like it too bad. They had better things to do than fuss with their hair. When i look at Cher i think How much trouble could Long hair be you just stand under the Shower add conditioner and rinse give it a spritz of mousse or gel for body blow it dry for an hour or so and then 12 hours a Day run your fingers through it to get it out of your face. The other Day i cleaned my Hairbrush Over the Toi let. It was t As much fun As it seemed when it happened to Crystal Gayle. In renal Prew Syndicate no kidding the reviews were in 1. West Side Story horrifying new York times z. In cold blood this in t writing new Republic 3. Lord of the files completely unpleasant new yorker 4. Fear of flying Crappy novel new statesman 5. Tropic of Capricorn flamboyant failure san Francisco chronicle 6. A chorus line too bad near miss new York times world features Syndicate j Page 10 sunday february 14. 1993
