European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - January 2, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse Z �1993 Tribune Media services inc. All rights reserved phere 2 emerge from the totally sealed off environment where they have lived for two years. Clearly visible behind them As they walk out is a Mound consisting of an estimated 5,000 dominoes pizza a 2 at the governments urging millions of americans receive flu shots administered by Hillary Rodham Clinton. 6 True item president Clinton announces that he wants to get the . Out of Somalia and is therefore sending 2,000 More troops Over there. 8 in a development that receives More coverage than anything that happened All year in Bosnia Michael Jordan announces that he will not be playing basketball this year. President Clinton vows to hold several town meetings. 21 in los Angeles the jury the Reginald Denny beating trial after much thinking concludes that person a is not necessarily trying to kill person b just because person a happens to very deliberately Bash person bus Skull in with a Brick. The verdict is applauded by scientists at the tobacco Institute. 23 an indignant attorney general Janet Reno warns the to Industry that it had better Stop broadcasting displays of gratuitous violence such As the Fri raid on the Branch Davidian compound. 25 True item researchers announce that they have developed a Cream derived from an asthma remedy that will remove fat from thighs. 26 millions of americans suddenly develop asthma 1 Ross Perot claims Naftal will permit Quot giant mexican squirrels Quot to Cross the Border and bite people. 9 in a live televised debate Over Naftal Ross Perot in what is widely viewed As a tactical error bites a1 Gore on the ankle. The feisty billionaire cannot be pried Loose until the vice president beats him unconscious with a hard cover copy of Earth in the balance. 20 Michael Jackson announces that he has become addicted to talking in a squeaky voice and will return to his Home planet for treatment. 22 on the 30th anniversary of president Kenny dyes death a los Angeles jury views the zapruder film and concludes that the shooting was a 2 the space shuttle endeavour blasts off on a historic Mission to repair the crippled Hubble orbiting space punch line. 6 an alarming new study show that 14 percent of americans a not speak English and the vast majority of them write computer manuals. 7 astronauts aboard the space shuttle endeavour arrive at the Hubble Telescope and discover that it has been smashed beyond recognition in a High Speed collision with the Mars observer. The astronauts elect to go to the orbiting space convenience store for Coffee. 16 a sheepish president Clinton announces that he finally got around to actually Reading the Naftal agreement and it turns out that Mexico now has 124 seats in the . Senate. 31 in a development that deeply disturbs the to to National Community the Chicago Tribune reports that the chinese have agreed to sell nuclear weapons to the Bureau of alcohol tobacco and firearms. We do not wish to create panic but this news comes Only hours before the scheduled broadcast of the end of the world episode of Bacavis and butt head. Its Best not to think about it. Tho Miami Herald january 2. 1994 sunday Page 9
