European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - October 16, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse Love hate a it i is after movies Joe Bob Briggs goes to the drive in to a Trell % in / do you get this All the time the movie is Over for like two w w seconds and the person next to you says "well.?" Why did t they Ever say i loved that movie or i hated that movie Why is it All they can say is Why is All the pressure on me to decide because whatever i say they re Gonna agree. Loved me hated me too. Was t it awful loved it except for the Hokey scene in the air was t that the worst scene Good movie though girls Are especially guilty of this. You can actually change your mind later and they la still agree with know now that i think about it that was t such a bad performance after All. He was trying to be a i was just thinking the same thing. What a great sle Zeball he what s going on Here i think some people Are afraid that if they can t agree on a movie then they re hopelessly in compatible. They la never agree on anything. Listen to me people. It s a dad blamed movie. You can like it or not like it and it does t mean diddly squat either Way. The movie can t make you a Good person or a bad person or a smart person or a stupid person. I m surprised i have to explain this stuff. Speaking of flicks that Kinda miss the whole Dang Point caged heat 2 just came out Twenty years after Jonathan Femme s original caged heat. Y y. / in this one the nubile pouty lipped jewel Shep Ard is a Cia agent who poses As the mistress of the King in a country that looks a lot like the Philippines and then when the King is assassinated we find out he was t really assassinated but it was All a fake Deal cause the King wants to go to Ameri Ca where hell be Safe but meanwhile in All the com motion the real rebels stole the King s daughter and put her in an Island fortress prison Why is it always an Island fortress prison and so now jewel has to carry a bag full of cocaine through the Airport so Shell get arrested and be sent to the same prison Only this other american girl happens to be in the Airport at the time and she gets arrested too and i Don t remember. There s Way too much plot getting in the Way of the Story. Thirty six dead bodies. Twenty breasts. Exploding speedboat. Exploding car with fireball. Shower scene. Killer dogs. Six cat fights. Kung fun. Bimbo fun. � drive in Academy award nominations for Chanel Akiko Hirai As the morose Princess in prison for saying my father is a Coward to desert his country Shepard As the female Jimmy Cagney tight lipped and unemotional or saying it happened to me,1 too and Pamela d Pula As the Black gang Leader who shoots heroin and dances Nek kid for saying i am not your Bluebird in a Cage. Concorde jewel Shepard stars in caged heat 2. Two and a half stars. Job Bob says Check it out. Joe Bob s advice to the hopeless nature Alert the starlite drive in theatre in Medford ore., has been reclaimed by the elements. Somebody ripped Down the screen and carried it off and now All that remains Are weeds and a for Sale sign. Chris Hjerrild of Ashland reminds us that without eternal vigilance it can happen Here. Dear Joe Bob my Girlfriend Wilria Waith tried to make me watch the sound of music i hate musicals i said. So she tells me this is not just a musical. Julie Andrews plays a woman empowered against oppressive masculine aggression of logos she shows that male autonomy results from the need to escape the maternal matrix that has misshapen the infant Man to at this Point i m thinking Julie Andrews was t she the one with the big curb feelers in Victor Victo Ria so i said Ohall right. Let s watch the Durn she was right. I know now that when i drink Beer with my Bowling pals Frank and Victor we re not having fun. We re denying the feminine. Out of my own helplessness As a Man i be had to consolidate myself with other males against the do minion of women. Up to now i have been trying to solve the problem of masculinity by eliminating the female. Joe Bob i wept during that movie. It changed my life. Praise god i m cured i kept saying. While Wilma whispered Don t you think it s time to employ a condom Ain t feminism great Doug Pitts retired Marine sergeant san Francisco dear Doug i be noticed the same thing. This crying thing lands More Nookie in the year 1994 than anything i be tried in Niy whole life. There s got to be a Book out on it somewhere. Dearj.b., Ever hear of a drive in with no cars Anderson a in Guam circa 1959-1960. Seems there weren t enough cars to go around. When i was there i recall Only six converted jeeps and one broken Down 6x6. We sat on wooden benches and marvelled at the big screen. One Nice thing about it no annoying headlights to disturb you or the screen. The Only drawback was the rain and soggy pop Corn. . Do you know of a drive in in pah rum Peak nev.? a Friend of mind says they have one. Bob Petersen Walnut Creek Calif. Dear Bob the drive in in Guam still stands i m told but the one in pah rum went pah rum. New York times Syndicate to discuss the meaning of life with Joe Bob or to get free junk in Tho mail or his world famous newsletter while Joe Bob Briggs . Box 2002, Dallas Texas 75221, Joe Bob s has a fax number at his trailer to Jse 21.4 985-7448. Joe Bob on Compuserve 76702,1435. Texas gov. Richards is a Success but she s still on the run Linda Ellerbee it was a sunday afternoon. The governor of Texas running for re election against a Man whose chief claim to Fame was that his daddy was once and Only once elected president of the United states was tired and a Little ticked off. Why should t she be Ann Richards has been Damn Good at her Job. I m in a tight race but that s of. I knew i would be Richards said on the Telephone however this is not the kind of race i like. This in t going to be decided by the two of us being out there stumping talking to people explaining who and what we arc explaining what we want to do. No it s to City Here right now. This has turned into one big to race and when that happens when it boils Down to sound bites a lot of stuff just gets right she is. Like reality. Reality is getting lost in this race. Take crime. Crime has been the Cen Ter piece of the Texas gubernatorial Campaign As it has been and will continue to be in campaigns throughout much of America. But Here s the Odd thing according to the Texas department of Public safety crime in Texas is on a three year decrease. In other words since Richards took office cutting by half the number of paroles granted adding 75,000 new prison Beds and doubling the minimum sentences of violent offenders crime has dropped. It is in fact the first time in 18 years there has been a drop in All major crime categories in that state. Yet a recent poll reveals that people in Texas think crime has gone up it s not just crime. Texas under Richards has developed a robust Economy one that has outpaced All other states according to the . Labor depart ment. Texas has led the nation in Job growth for the last three years in a Row. The state has a $2.2 billion budget surplus. The Richards backed lottery has been the most successful lottery in the country contributing More than $1.6 billion to the budget. Ann Richards ought to be a shoo in this time. Right now in Texas the numbers look like this about 40 percent of the people favor Richards and 40 percent favor Bush Junior so the race will be decided by the 20 percent who Haven t made up their minds. That s the 20 percent Richards Hopes her message will reach in time. That s the 20 percent she Hopes will actually pay attention to More than images and sound bites. History tells us that not everybody will listen but some will. Some will. Franklin Roosevelt believed most people never listened to politicians and to prove it once in a while he would Greet guests a White House receptions by saying hello Wel come i murdered my grandmother most people would nod or murmur polite approval but along came one fellow the one who listened who did hear what the president said and responded diplomatically or. President i m sure she deserved that s the voter Ann Richards is looking for. The one who listens. Meanwhile the governor has other problems when it comes to perception . She told me that recently one of her Campaign workers while polling people about their opinion of her opponent had spoken to a voter who said Well i Don t know Why they re even letting him run for governor. After All he is president of the United and so it goes. King features Syndicate. October 16, 1994 sunday Page 21
