European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - June 7, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Dreading verbs that Are drug and snuck into usage James j. Kilpatrick the writer s Art to ask a writer to name his favorite part of speech is like asking a violinist to name his favorite concerto. There a something to be said for the Mendelssohn and the Bruch but the Sibelius is a Beauty and the Brahms is fun to play. Most writers i expect in their turn at trivia would name a the verb. This takes nothing away from a Good reliable noun. Adjectives arc delightful adverbs Are loverly but it is the verb that gives a sentence life. This being so it is a pity that some writers abuse their verbs so badly. In Bloomington ind., a movie critic for the Bloomington monthly spoke harshly of moviegoers who spurn any film that is simply a pretentiously amusing. A this crowd is composed of people who have drank at least one bottle of Perrier and know the name of the Captain in moby  Well websters ninth new collegiate says that one can get drank on Perrier but not in this column. The past participle gives trouble in other contexts. At hand is an unidentified clipping about a miss America pageant. The executive director was negotiating with Bert Parks a who had Sang there she is to newly crowned miss americas for 25  he Hadnot Sang it he had Sung it. Sounds better that Way. From the London observer ask ask comes a feature about the bullfighter of Spain a a manolete or even Al Cordobes is reputed to have swarm across Rivers to trespass on private Bull  in England no less than in the United states the principal parts of a a swim Are still swim swam swum. Sen. Edward Kennedy testified for his Nephew in last years famous rape trial. Reported the associated press a a today a appearance of the senator came the Day after the accuser winded up nearly 10 hours of sometimes tearful  winded up the Apps Man in Palm Beach was so wedded to a winded up Quot he used it again a on thursday the accused winded up her testimony by defiantly telling defense attorney Roy Black your client raped me a gracious Merriam Webster lists a a winded without comment. Random House lists it As  american heritage will have nothing to do with  bully for american heritage the formulation is childish. It is the kind of past tense you get from a 4-year-old. Use  we have talked before about  i done to like it but the san Antonio express news loves it. Last August Quot the Man had snuck up behind the deputies and hit one of them Over the head with a Beer  and in March a the gang members snuck up on the House Vargas  the los Angeles times adopted the Bastard Quot snuck in an item about actor Gary Burghoff. He played the part of radar in a a so. The actor was being considered for a big to commercial contract but a an executive of the Oil conglomerate snuck into a screening and was not pleased with what he  the a last year reported an incident of macabre vandalism in Commerce City Colo. A the vandals apparently snuck into 115-year-old Riverside cemetery used a crowbar to open a mausoleum then removed the Heads from two  i know that dictionaries acknowledge the existence of a snuck a but a a sneaked is so much better. A a snuck is Over too quickly. There is no suspense in it. The Long a a cd makes a a sneaked infinitely sneaker Edward Kennedy was caught in a s wrong wind. Crafter More sinister. In in same fashion i would ban  in october 1990, the Indianapolis Star covered a Colts game. A Bentley took a nine Yard swing pass and drug two chiefs on his Back before stretching the Ball across the goal  my ear likes  it is much dragger. Only in a comic sense As in Quot my granddaughter drug me to her recital a would Quot drug be effective. In serious matters like a Colts touchdown its better to go with  pursuing the topic a couple of citations have come in of a Astrid cd a As in a an armed teen Ager striped into a High school classroom and took 11 classmates  nope. The past tense is  and have a care with a to  the Atlanta Constitution reported that judge David Souter a a treated a moderate Trail at his confirmation hearing. Some permissive lexicographers approve a a treated a but not i. In Portland the oregonian put a theatrical note on Page 1 a Clear rods the boards on  nope. The principal parts Are tread trod and for the past participle either trod or trodden. The judge trod Lear treads. How do you suppose foreigners Ever learn English Universal press Syndicate having children can be something to yell about Tony Kornheiser my Friend Dan who is my age a which is to say much too old to be comparison shopping for buggies a just had a baby. This is Danes second wife and second family. He had two babies during the Nixon administration so it has been quite a while Between spit ups. Courtney is 2 months old and not yet sleeping through the night. So the other night Dan found himself with a warm bottle in his hand at 4 a.m., As new fathers often do. A i was rocking her a Dan said Quot and she was almost asleep and 1 thought if i Sang to her that might do it. Then i realized the Only song i know is Thunder rond Quot men being pigs i asked Dan Why he was doing the feeding. The first time around when the Colts were still in Baltimore Danes wife handled the 4-ers. That was the Standard arrangement in those last gasp Days of the single income household when men were the providers and women were the nurturers. It worked passably Well for 5,000 years until the invention of the summer Home. Now everyone works and everyone feeds. Dan and Meg have arrived at a a a feeder and a a changer system the a a changer is the preferable role As you hand off to the a feeder Quot having amused the baby As the bottle is being prepared. As most men would Dan has tried everything to become the permanent Quot changer a sort of the do of parenting. He has offered lame reasons like a she drinks better with you a to inspired reasons like Quot she a so Beautiful and looks so much like you that i weep when i feed her and the Salt from my tears will get in her Mouth and cause  needless to say nothing has worked which is what you get i say for marrying a Harvard woman. All this talk about babies got me thinking about the lies we Tell ourselves about being parents a like How Well never give our kids pacifiers. Pacifiers Yacc huh they re not Only ugly they push the kids Teeth out of line. Which works until the third or fourth extended crying jag after which we try and Black amp Decker the pacifier into juniors Mouth and rationalize Quot so hell get braces of a i swore i d never hit my child. Never id reason with mine. Id never Ever resort to Force. And it works for a while until you paint yourself into this Corner a wok Billy time for  no response Quot Billy  no response Quot now a the time Bill. Go to  no response Quot in a not going to ask you again  no response a look Billy you either go to bed now or ill whack  whoops did i say that did i actually put myself in the put up or shut up Mode with a 4-year-old? Gayac Ckik this is Why it s always better to use this for a last line Quot Billy if you done to go to bed right now ill kill the  having had to smack the kid to save face you now spend the next half hour copying up trying to convince him you Aren t the monster you seemed when you turned physical. Quot can i make it up to you son would ice Cream help cd Mon lets go get some ice Cream. Tell you what lets go to Paris and get some ice Cream a the ice creams great there. You la love Paris. I did t mean to hit you son. Your mom said you were annoying her and i asked a what do you want me to do about it a she said something like a spank  maybe i got the word wrong. Maybe it was a thank  it happens. Anyway it Hurt me More than it Hurt  and is there anything quite As terrifying As having to discipline your kid in a Public place which is naturally the Only place  drop straight to the floor and begin howling right out of the last scene in Currie. It does no Good to say to the people who have gathered around Quot i did no to touch him. Honest  advice is to head for Frozen foods and pretend it s someone else skid. Eventually hell either Calm Down or join the . Scenes like this Are Why when i take my children shopping i Only go to stores where i done to care if i Ever go Back again a like a discount food warehouse. Who cares what your kids do there you la never see any of those shoppers again unless its at a police lineup. The place Hasni to been cleaned since 1984. The floor is covered with broken melons and Chicken parts. It looks like Beirut after a thunderstorm. And above the Din you hear other parents Clear As a Bell saying the same words you be come to say so often though you swore you never would Quot because i said so that a Why a creators Syndicate Page 2-1 a sunday june 7. 1992