European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - December 13, 1992, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Gifts continued from Page 5 anytime. It says right on the package a ready to  it also says a Abha but amp citric acid added to help protect  so you know that even if you save it for several years in for example your Glove compartment the flavor will still be great or at least protected. We taste tested our beef stick at the Holiday gift command Center and we can enthusiastically report that although the tangy taste is a not for everybody a it disappears almost entirely after just a few Days. Bull scrotum $35 from Goode company Barbecue 8911 Katy freeway Houston Texas 77024, phone 713 464-1901. Ladies Here a a unique item that a bound to cause the men on your gift giving list to wince with Holiday Joy. We found this item in the great state of Texas motto a where Good taste originated someplace else Quot. We were in Houston at a cafeteria style restaurant called Goode company Barb que and when we brought our tray to the cashier we saw hanging overhead a Large selection of these Odd looking things. At first we thought they might be some kind of rare hairy Prairie coconuts. But when we read the Label and found out what they were we were so overcome by excitement that we nearly dropped our pork Platter. Because this item according to the Label is a an actual scrotum of the King of the  that a right. This is a personal private part that somebody was Able to obtain we done to even want to think about How a from an actual Bull. Judging from the size of this item the Bull was an extremely masculine animal. We be been in a lot of major league locker rooms in our Day and we have never seen anything approaching the capacity of this particular item As measured in cubic feet. So we think it would be the perfect gift for a woman to give to that a special Many to express the romantic message a Darling this reminds me of you Only much  Sylvester Stallone has 14 of these the Bull scrotum also has Many practical uses around the Home. You can put things into it. You can even Wear it on your head assuming you have a certain amount of what the French Call join do Vivoc literally a soybean curd for brain. Each Bull scrotum comes with a convenient leather carrying strap so you done to have to touch it. Done to be fooled by cheap imitations. This is the Only Bull scrotum endorsed by the league of women voters and the Rev. Pat Robertson. Worm Blower around a $2. Manufactured by i indy Little Joe inc., Box a 1110 Wright st., brai nerd Minn. 56401. Suggested by John Cahill of Alexandria a. A Fisher person a worm says a lot about him. When he a out fishing with his buddies he does not want to reach into his bait bucket Grope around and pull out a Pale Limp flaccid worm. He wants a worm he can be proud of a vibrant glistening throbbing worm a worm that will cause the buddies to spit enviously and say a whoa Check out norms  the Fishe person on your Holiday gift list will be sure of having the night Crawler of his dreams every time if you give him this worm Blower from the  line of Fine fishing accessories. As the package states a blowing up a Crawler not Only keeps it off the Bottom but can make a skimpy shrivelled up Crawler look like a super  basically the worm Blower is a plastic squeeze bottle with a syringe Type Needle on it. The sports person simply Sticks the Needle into the worm squeezes the bottle and voila the worm explodes. No ideally that does not happen although apparently it is a danger because the directions state squeeze worm Blower being care Al 7 not to r rupture Crawler. Quot but we still think the worm Blower is a very thoughtful gift idea for any Man win is concerned about the size and jerkiness of his worm. He understand that Sylvester Stallone has 22 of these Cap buddy $5.95 from Carol Wright gifts 340 Appl Creek rd., Lincoln neb. 6s544, phone 402 474-5174. Suggested by Kathryn Godlewski of Racine wis. Baseball style Caps present a real cleaning Challenge to the conscientious homemaker. One major Challenge is getting the Cap off of the head of the person who wears it. We do not wish to single out any gender Here but a lot of men never take their Caps off a not in restaurants not at funerals not in bed not while undergoing brain surgery. Even if you do get the owner to remove the Cap you find that its encrusted with a thick layer of grime that has been formed into a kind of mortar by dried sweat. This poses a cleaning problem and until recently the Only proven Way to solve it was to make a paste mixture of baking soda and kerosene rub it thoroughly into the Cap then set fire to it. The problem with this approach is that the Man has to go get a whole new Cap and some models a especially the ones with advanced features such As the adjustable brim a can run As High As $2.79. Fortunately it is no longer necessary to Lay out that kind of Money thanks to the amazing new Cap buddy. We can to understand How come in a supposedly advanced country it took so Long for somebody to tji Ink this up. What it is basically is a plastic thing trial you put a Cap in so that you can Wash the Cap in the dishwasher. Then you run your dishwasher normally and bang All that icky grime has been washed off the Cap and spewed All Over your silverware. So a amps illustrations by Wes Booher maybe you a better Wash the Cap All by itself. We think this is a terrific product concept and we arc hoping to see new items added to the buddy line including the sock buddy the shoe buddy and the Jockstrap buddy. Eventually we May see the Day when you can Wash All your clothes in the dishwasher and somebody will develop products that enable you to Wash your dishes in the washing machine. Hug Evtech Siren Loudspeaker hat $7.50 from american science and surplus 601 Linden place Evanston 111. 60202, phone 7080 475-8440. You need this item. Everybody who sees this item in action at the Holiday gift command Center immediately says a they i need one of  and no wonder. This is a plastic hat with a Battery powered Light and Loudspeaker mounted on the top and a microphone dangling Down. If you press a Button on the Side of the microphone and speak into it your amplified voice comes out of the Loudspeaker on top of your head with incredibly Low Fidelity. That alone would make this item Worth owning but there a another switch on the microphone and you can use it to make three kinds of Siren noises. Trust us. When you put this hat on everybody pays attention to you. You have a distinct advantage Over Ordinary humans most of whom done to even have loudspeakers let alone sirens. We think the president of the United states should Wear one of these hats to give him an Edge when he meets with foreign Heads of state for High level negotiations. . President through his Loudspeaker and another thing. We want you to leave the kurd alone. Saddam Hussein now wait just a minute. You re talking about the internal affairs of . President turning on his Siren whoop whoop whoop whoop. Saddam Hussein of of this hat is also great for communicating at loud cocktail parties. And successful businesspersons Tell us that wearing this hat around the office greatly enhances their stature. We understand that h. Ross Perot owns 4,000 of these High fashion slippers $29.98 from Taylor gifts 355 e. Conestoga rd., Wayne a. 19087-0206, phone 800 551-3900. Nit mates suggested by Annette Eubank of Gardenville pa., and Tom Ward of fall River mass. Did you Ever wonder what your leading tasteful fashion designers such As Oscar a a do la Renta do when they get Home after a bad Day of designing clothes that Ordinary dirt Ball humans such As yourself cannot afford the answer is they kick off their shoes and put on a pair of slippers shaped like giant Budweiser cans. Yes Budweiser slippers Are All the rage this year in both new York and Paris. We understand that Ivana Trump owns 46 pairs another Slipper that is extremely popular among tasteful Jet set fashion cognoscenti is the headlight Slipper which has a Battery powered electric Light in the toe. This amazing Slipper Advance Means that if a cognoscenti is awakened in the Middle of the night by an urgent phone Call informing him that he must immediately Fly to Paris to handle a fashion emergency involving for example trouser pleats he can just switch on his headlight slippers and they will Light his Way As he scoots around packing his Valise. When a fashion emergency arises there generally is not enough time to turn on the room lights probably you Are saying a a it Sall Well and Good to have slippers with lights in them but what i am really looking for by Way of a git item is a Slipper that makes  fortunately concealed inside one of the slippers is an electronic Battery powered device which w Hen you stomp your feet makes a noice that sounds exactly like a stadium crowd roaring we re talking about a Small Battery powered stadium crowd inspirational night Light $3.95 from Carol Wright gifts 340 Appl Creek rd., Lincoln neb. 68544, phone 402 474-5174. If you re in the Market for a tasteful night Light shaped like a major religious figure a and who in to this is the item for you. We re not making any claims about this night Light having special Powers. We re not suggesting for example that it you Brush your Teeth in front of this night Light your gum problems will be miraculously healed or that the rays Page 6 a sunday december 13, 1992