European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - January 09, 1994, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Children from the cover communication is desperately needed. And studies show that open communication does some Good to some degree. Still the baby Boom parents Are the first Genera. Tion to try to create a sweeping tradition of freely discussing sex with their kids. It in t easy. Janet 37, says she keeps postponing talking to her 13-year-old daughter. I kept waiting for the right time says Janet who spoke on the condition that she not be further identified but i am just too afraid to bring it up. I m not sure what to  in her silence she is like three quarters of Ameri can parents says Maria Juliani a health expert who counsels families in the division of adolescent Medicine at childrens Hospital of los Angeles. I think parents and children Are More aware of the need to communicate about sexuality Juliani says. There Are significant risks out there his and the other sexually transmitted diseases As Well As sexual abuse arid acquaintance rape. The awareness that these things Are happening has brought to Light that there is a responsibility to protect kids against these  to whether parents Are doing a better Job i Don t have a sense that they Are she says adding i do think More people Are  these Are the facts that face today s american. Parents ".  .,.-. In 1990,53 percent of 15-to 17-year-old girls re ported being sexually Active while a 1988 study of 15-year-old boys and girls reported 32 percent of boys and 27 percent of girls had sex. More than 1 million babies Are born to adolescent mothers annually. 2.5 million teens Are infected with a sexually transmitted disease each year. That s one fifth of the nation s sexually transmitted disease cases. The time has passed when we can let our discomfort stand in the Way of talking about sexuality jul lianj.notes.-. Kids also feel an urgency to turn to their parents with questions. Studies overwhelmingly show that kids View their parents As their most important source of information even though fewer than half of adolescents report talking to their parents. So where does a Parent begin experts agree that the Central lesson is to create a Good atmosphere to talk about anything. The most important message is that nothing a child does will be made worse by talking to the Par ent about it says sol Gordon co author of the Book raising your child conservatively in a sexually permissive world fireside. There is no Way of dealing with sexuality unless the Parent has created the atmosphere of love and caring. Unless that atmosphere is there nothing works. The child will  but what parents often do is create a negative atmosphere by becoming angry judgmental uncomfortable embarrassed or fearful. Very often we Are close mouthed uncomfortable and make it difficult for kids to broach the topic says Judith Pratt chief of the health education Sec Tion for California s office of family planning. The child often takes the initiative and asks questions. But they have to feel they won t get jumped on if they ask the  Pratt s office recently launched the education now and babies later program which teaches 12 to 14-year-Olds techniques to postpone sexual involve ment and offers parents like those in Santa Ana a class on How to talk to their kids. To prepare for launching the program educators asked kids what they wanted. They wanted a mixture of directness and the Opportunity to talk says Pratt. They welcomed it. They in Many ways Are much More open than Par  whose own parents never discussed sex May be embarrassed. But embarrassment is a sure fire Way to Cut off communication experts warn. If you Are embarrassed the teen is going to pick that up right away and the teen will think this is not of to talk about this " says Vicki Karlan coordinator of health education for the Culver City youth health Center. Some parents do not want their children to learn about sex until they reach a particular age. But you d have to live on the Moon to shelter your children from sexual messages experts say. If your child is talking to friends going to movies or watching to your child is already getting sexed cation Pratt says. Your Challenge is to help them process the information they re  but in the process some parents fear talking to their kids because they Are afraid of saying the wrong things. Although what you say masters it s More important to make it known that you Are receptive to questions says Lisa Fries Anderson of the los Angeles regional family planning Council. Parents can obtain books attend classes or Call family planning clinics. Videos Are available. School Counselor or nurses Are also Good sources. One of the most difficult issues for parents is when discomfort about their own sexuality interfere with their ability to talk to their children. The Parent needs to explore what is making them uncomfortable and work through that Juliani says. Kids May interpret that there is something wrong with my body. Mom is being judgmental hang ups about sexuality can be passed from generation to  other parents resist because they fear that talking to their kids would influence the child to Experiment. But some researchers suggest that open communication has Little effect on whether the child engages in sex according to one recent study just Dis cussing the topic did not influence the child s decision. But other surveys have found that talking to kids can delay activity and help transmit important attitudes. However talking about sex did result in a greater likelihood of a youth using birth control says Melody  orphaned by aids 1983 1984 1985 1986 1987 1988 1989 199o 1991 1992 1993 1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2ooo More than 80,000 youths will be orphaned by the aids epidemic by the turn of the Century. 74,712 81,972 source journal of the american medical association aps a Graham a social psychologist at mount mercy col lege in Cedar rapids Iowa who surveyed 1,380 Stu dents in seventh and 12th grades. Also adolescents who used their parents As opposed to friends As a primary source for problem solving were less Likely to be sexually Active. Adolescents who thought their parents would be upset if they had Intercourse were less Likely to have sex. The world aids situation global total 13 million 611,589 estimated cumulative adult his infections including aids cases and deaths. Reported cumulative aids cases in adults an children As of Jan. 4,1993. North America Western Europe Eastern Europe & Central Asia 50,000 2,850 East Asia & Pacific 25,000 663 South & Southeast Asia 1.5 million 1,445 latin America & the Caribbean 1.5 million 64,048 North Africa & Middle East 75,000 1,160 sub saharan Africa 8 million 210,376 Australia 25,000 3,963 source world health organization aps a january 9. 1994 sunday pages