European Stars and Stripes (Newspaper) - March 31, 1991, Darmstadt, Hesse                                Odds amp ends taking a Field trip with the soon Smiss manner Judith Martin United features Cindy Chambers columnist i consider myself a concerned Parent Espe Dally when it comes to the education of my children. In be been covering the re Frigara Tor with their schoolwork for so Long that. Somewhere along the line in be completely lost the Freezer portion. And i always make a Point of looking extremely interested during Par. Ent teacher conferences despite the fact that the Only thing going through my mind is the discomfort of sitting in one of those tiny chairs for half an hour. A recently in the spirit of concerned parenthood i volunteered to Chaperon my 11-year-old s school Field trip. I figured it would give me a priceless Opportunity to examine the Dodds i system firsthand As a yell As a Chance to flex my c authoritarian Muscles in front of a Bunch of in in pics Sponable Little sixth graders. Also i knew if i / did no to get out of the apartment soon i was going to Start randomly tossing transformers off our third floor Balcony. Of course the real reason i volunteered is because it is every Parent s god Given right to interfere with the educational process As much As pos. Siulc. Sometimes this Means staying up till 4 30 in the morning assembling Complex organic molecules out of packing peanuts for the school Sci Cnoc fair because if your child did it it would look exactly like the work of a fourth grader. Other times it Means calling up your Daugh to cry Smath teacher to inform him in no Uncertain terms that the math Book is wrong you be done problem 117 at least six times and the answer in the Book in t even close to what you came up with. Sometimes it Means chaperoning school Field trips. The first thing you la notice upon entering the classroom is that children Are much larger and older than they used to be. In fact in my Daugh. Tors classroom several of the students looked old enough to have Little sixth graders of their own. When 1 remarked nervously on this to the teach or he responded a a in a not the teacher Man in a one of the spoonts a then he went Back to shaving or whatever he was doing before i arrived. The fact that Many children Hay become Gigantic mutants in the past 20 years or so has had a profound effect on the educational system. It certainly makes chaperoning Field trips More exciting. Whereas Ini the old Days chaperone used to represent authority by their Mere presence today it takes a cursing English English cursing dictionary and at least an elementary knowledge of Kung fun. A a a a a a a a a so Volunteer. Get involved. Or just come Oyer and help me w Ith this Chart in a doing for my daughter s history class. It represents the decline of my own involvement in the educational process. Then when we re done w cd a have some real fun a randomly tossing transformers off the Balcony. D ear miss manners a i am a 20-Ycar-old female and a smoker. I am very aware of the risks involved in smoking i am also aware that my smoking bothers others. I try to be very careful not to let my smoke be inhaled by others. But More often than not it is the non smokers who need an etiquette lesson. Last sunday at the Airport standing in the taxi line i lit up one of my dreaded cigarettes. As you know flights arc non smoking and i Hadnot been Able to smoke for a Nail biting turbulent three hours. A a a.  ��.���. A a a. Suddenly from behind me i heard and Felt someone blowing into my hair. When i turned i discovered a distinguished looking Man staring menacingly at me. In answer to my puzzled expression he said a i was just blowing the smoke Back at  i mumbled an embarrassed apology and put out my cigarette. I understood the Many a frustration and disgust at my smoking. But he could just As easily have asked me to put out my cigarette instead of Ere rating a drama. Was i right to feel offended by this Many a action. Gentle Reader a miss manners is not a smoker herself but she has noted that foul emissions from some non smokers arc hazardous to the Public welfare. The idea that health conscious righteousness justifies rudeness is a repulsive one. Bolstering the argument with information about rude smok cars who refuse to respond to polite requests does a pot move miss manners. None of this relieves the individual from behaving  what impresses her is your behaviour. Not Only were you prepared to respond to a polite Objet Tion but you responded politely to a rude one. Miss manners Hopes the smoke Blower will realize that it was his behaviour not yours that was publicly offensive. Dear miss manners a my sister in Law i am a newlywed has told us that if we Ever need to borrow Money we can borrow it from her and her husband. I thought this was very generous a until she said we would have to repay with inter a Cost. A a a a a a a a a. V a  a a i would never borrow Money from anyone without repaying the loan but this strikes me As being in poor taste since she and her husband arc fairly Well off. In my own family we would never think of asking for payment with interest from a  has brought this up More than once and it makes me very uncomfortable. I can to say too much to my husband without making him feel As if in a putting his sister Down. Is there a tactful Way to handle this without alienating my new inlays gentle Reader a who docs your sister in Law think she is the National Bank drumming up new business. Miss manners cannot be As generous As you in calling even an interest free offer of a loan generous. Only if the woman had reason to suspect that you needed Money should she have been discussing the subject with you at All. Nevertheless the woman is your sister in Law and As both you and your husband seem to realize there is no Point in alienating her. When the offer is renewed simply say a thank you a i by Lieve you mentioned this. We arc really not  a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a say it As often As necessary. No matter How much the woman is hoping to hear of your having financial troubles she will eventually realize that her probing is not  Cindy Chambers is a military family member living in Schweinfurt. Germany a a. A for the week of april 1, Aries March 21 april 19 feeling More serious than usual no sweat. Rely on experience instead of hunches. Release old fears habits. Old friends help. Taurus april 20 May 20 Don t waste time on Idle pursuits. Forge ahead with ambition. Psychological Block is removed. Rely on yourself rather than others. Gemini May 21 june 20 take a conservative approach to business. Humor serves you Well. Break Down Large tasks express emotions without guilt. Cancer june 21july 22 plan a pleasure trip. Socialize with dear friends. Recent pressures released. Painful emotional encounters prove fruitless. Leo july 23 aug. 22 new beginnings approach take risks. Break with the past. Superiors see your chances. Rewards imminent keep love on  Virgo aug. 23 sept. 22 try new approach to old problems. Past Isnit necessarily prologue lighten up at work pressure is Only what you make it. A a �?�".���. Libra sept. 23 nov. 21 pay attention to dreams. Strangers bring glad tidings. Share Fortune with others. Keep relationships Friendly not Over sexual. A Scorpio oct. 23 nov 21 mental gymnastics causing worry let it rest. Physical exercise releases tension. Plan a hiking trip hobbies help too. Sagittarius nov. 22 dec. 20 done to argue Over minor Points. See the big picture. Your enthusiasm motivates others. Lay the groundwork for advancement. A a Capricorn dec. 21 Jan. 19 career ambitions really zoom. Whereas renewed Confidence coming from inside of course. Be the Good humor Man. Spread  aquarius Jan. 20 feb. 18 say goodbye to secure but Dull work. Do what you love. Travel Bug bites again. Take advantage. Be yourself in relationships. Pisces. Feb 19 March 20 learn the Power of your subconscious mind. Personal projects get Green Light. Patience is a virtue. Done to Waffle on issues. V a Copley news service. Page 10 a sunday March 31, 1991